Twisted Galaxies
by silverVOID
Summary: A mysterious irken from Zim's past comes to haunt him, while the Tallest are overthrown by an enemy who will stop at nothing to destroy the Empire Zim, Dib, Gaz, Tak, and Teth, a ghost irken with mind control powers, must team up to save the universe from destruction. The time has come for 3 to rise and save the Twisted Galaxies. Rated T for violence and blocked profanity.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Food fight**

8:00:59, September 01. Location: Ms. Bitters's room, Skool

Ms: Bitters: Hello class. Today we will be learning about-  
*kaBLAM*!  
*Teth, Anon, and Teth's broken spaceship falls through ceiling x'D*  
Teth: Ow! WTF?! *glares through dust cloud*  
Class: *staring as if an alien+robot+broken spaceship just fell through the ceiling*  
Teth: _Crud! _*puts brainwash, illusion, and confusion charm on every witness and makes Mrs. Bitters think that just transferred to school*  
Ms. Bitters: Class, as yet another celebration for overcrowding, we will be having yet another new student. Poochy, you're going to the underground classround *presses button*  
*Poochy falls into hole under desk and screams*  
Teth: *walks in* Hey, guys. My name is Teth, and I am NOT an alien, Dib. *smiles innocently*  
Dib: _How'd she know I thought/knew she is an alien?! And how does she know my name?!_  
Teth: _You already accused Zim, Tak really was an alien, it's pretty obvious. _*shrugs*_ And I just do, okay?_  
Dib: Stop reading my mind! It'S FREAKY!  
Teth: Dib, you need to relax. Everyone knows mind reading is not possible, aliens are not real, and that there is an underground classround.  
Ms. Bitters: I TOLD YOU! doom...doom...doom...doom...  
Zim: *staring suspiciously* Maybe Dib's going crazy again, or she is a mind reader. Yet she looks awfully familiar...  
Teth: Well of course I'm familiar, Zim! We're... cousins, remember?  
Zim: *hissing* Irkins don't have cousins, remember?!  
Teth: *hissing back* It's a cover story, smart one!  
Ms. Bitters: ...doom...doom...doom...go now.  
*Lunch break*  
Dib: I'm telling you Gaz, she's an alien!  
Gaz: *playing her Gameslave2 (when is she NOT?!)* If you don't shut up, I'm gonna punch you so hard that your extremely tiny brains will ooze out your ginormous head through your ear.  
Dib: *not listening* She just fell through the ceiling! And then the class just goes frozen for a second and acts as if it's normal to fall through the ceiling! And then Mrs. Bitters says that she's a new student here, but I know she's not, and-  
Gaz: *opens one eye warningly* ngh...  
Dib: ...um...I'll just shut up now, heheh *sweatdrops nervously*  
Gaz: You do that, "Big-Head Boy"  
Dib: MY HEAD IS NOT BIG!  
Gaz: *smacks Dib*  
Dib: *eyes rolling* ...and as I was saying, 2+2=Ohio! *falls over*  
Gaz: *smiles* _finally some peace!_  
*Otherside of cafeteria...*  
Zim: But really, are you a mind reader?  
Teth: Yeah *bites sandwich* *spits it out* WTF IS IN THIS JUNK?!  
*awkward silence FTW*  
Teth: I-I mean- Yum! This is delicious! *forces smile* *whispering to Zim* really, what is this...crap?! It-It BURNS!  
Zim: It's meat. You get used to it.  
Teth: YOU'RE SAYING YOU CAN EAT THIS?!  
Zim: There's a better use... *smirks* *tosses it at Dib so hard the impact pushes him over* FOOD FIGHT!  
*Multiple kids start throwing food at each other (i wish i could be there...)*  
Teth: All of a sudden I like this "meat" *smiles*  
Zim: *not really listening because he's throwing a green hotdog at Keef* uh-huh...  
*Ms. Bitters walks into room talking on phone*  
Ms. Bitters: ...and this is the third alien we have had this year! Do you know what this means for our plan for world conquest (because Mrs. Bitters is working with the lunch lady who really is a man to conquer Earth)? Sure one failed, and the other is to dumb, but there's another who cast charms on my class, so she could get it before us! *pause* ...yes, yes, I know, the meat, the meat, but it seems seems to be that the alien don't eat it. We must disguise as some random alien food but we'll need research for that. Contact the librarian, maybe she'll have some useful info for a change- *gets hit by flying hamburger* -just a minute- WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!?  
*Everyone freezes* *mashed potatoes hit wall and float away* ZIM-  
Zim: f*ck  
Ms. Bitters: -TETH-  
Teth: sh*t  
Ms. Bitters: -DIB-  
Dib: d*mn  
Ms: Bitters: -AND GAZ-  
Gaz: Your mother is a *beep beep beep beep*Laura Mendsom*beep beep beep*Inventive menium*beep beep beep beep*tra goo la*beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep* hippopotamus*beep beep beep beep beep beep* Republican *beep beep beep*Daniel Radcliffe *beep beep beep beep* with a bucket of *beep beep beep beep* in a castle far away where no one can hear you *beep beep beep beep beep beep* soup *beep beep beep* with a bucket of *beep beep* Mickey Mouse *beep beep* with a stick of dynamite *beeeeeepppp* magical *beep beep beep beep* ALAKAZAM!  
Ms. Bitters: -CAN I ATLEAST GET THROUGH ONE WORD WITHOUT SOMEONE CUSSING?!- any how, YOU FOUR, INTO MY ROOM NOW!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: The Mission**

12:15:45, Monday, September 01. Location: Ms. Bitters's  
room, Skool

Ms. Bitters: It has come to my attention that-  
Zim: -Dib started the food fight! Not me! It was totally him! Blame him!  
Ms. Bitters: -this isn't about the food fight, Zim. You guys will have detention later. As I was saying, the Almighty Tallest *Zim and Teth look up at her with sudden interest* has called to inform me that you 4 are needed in a... special mission, as they-  
Zim and Teth: OMGWEHAVEASPECIALMISSIONASSI GNEDFROMTHEALMIGHTYTALLEST-  
OMGOMGTHEALMIGHTYTALLESTOMGW HENDOESITSTARTOMGOMGOMG!  
Ms. Bitters: *raises eyebrow inquiringly* ...as I was saying, as they...um...*thinking of excuse* ...um... are being attacked! Yeah! and they, um- need your help! And-  
Teth: Wait... how do you know about The Almighty Tallest? How do you know we're...aliens?  
Ms. Bitters: *smiles crookedly* Zim talks in his sleep  
Zim: DO NOT!  
Ms. Bitters: "No, no, not that sharp tool, don't experiment on me, you got it all wrong, I'm not an alien!" *smiles triumphantly at Zim*  
Zim: *dumbstruck and blushing furiously* ...YOU'RE LYING!  
Gaz: No, she's right. Dib forced me on a spy expedition.  
Dib: No I didn't! *also dumbstruck and blushing furiously*  
Ms. Bitters and Gaz: You did!  
Zim and Dib: YOU'RE LYING!  
Teth: ...um...how do you you know the Almighty Tallest?  
Ms: Bitters: *glares* I just do, okay?  
Teth: _Something's not right..._  
Gaz: Wait, why'd you call me and Dib if its just for a stupid mission for the alien "cousins"?  
Ms. Bitters: *annoyed* I don't know, maybe you're part alien or whatever because the Tallest asked for you two also (but to be honest the underground classroom's getting full so I can't send you there). Anyhow, they're being attacked-  
Zim: By who?  
Teth: The Resisty?  
Ms: Bitters: -Lemme finish- by some unknown force created in the heart of the Massive itself.  
Zim and Teth: What?!  
Ms. Bitters: the Tallest are not The Tallest any more, apparently. They were overthrown.  
Zim and Teth: *both gawking* They were what?!  
Gaz: You two need some alien hearing aid, because she just said, o-ver-th-rown.  
Zim: ...I didn't even know that was possible.  
Dib: ...So we're going into Zim's spaceship (because Teth's fell through the ceiling), riding in it for like, 6 months, going into a planet that is trying to take over Earth, defeat the new Tallest, and go home like nobody's business?!  
Ms. Bitters: Yeah, pretty much  
Dib: This is the most cheerful I've seen you, Ms. Bitters, you feeling okay or did the glow-in-the-dark hamburger that hit you in the face do something to you?  
Ms. Bitters: ...Another detention, Dib  
Dib: Aw, come on!  
Zim: *stands on Ms. Bitter's desk* Then let's go!  
Teth: *groans* Detention, remember?  
Ms. Bitters: *sighs* Get off my desk, Zim  
Zim: *gets off desk sadly* ...I felt so tall  
Teth: *facepalm*  
Gaz: Well, okay then *plays Gameslave2* OH CURSE YOU VAMPIRE PIGGIES!  
*awkward silence*  
Gaz: What? They shoot fire from their eyes! It's impossible to win against multiple vampire piggies shooting fire from their eyes!  
*another awkward silence*  
Keef: *shoots through window* HIYA BUDDY! *flies away*  
Zim: Shouldn't he be disintegrated by now?  
Ms. Bitters: I wish ...stupid pipsqueak  
Teth: What did you do to him?  
Zim: *sigh* the eye replacement thing to make him think a squirrell was me wore off, and the happy-popping solution didn't work, so I shoved him down the garbage disposal  
Teth: Garbage disposal? No wonder it didn't work! Send into the sun through a cannon instead.  
Zim: Hey! Great idea! Where'd that come from?  
Teth: *proudly stating* It's a combo of sending Skoodge into space with a cannon split with that one ep (Hobo 13 was it?) where you and one dude were trapped in a spaceship with no controllers headed toward the sun. Hey, shouldn't you be dead?  
Zim: We're cartoon characters. We can't die.  
Teth: So that explains why Keef isn't dead!  
Zim: Oh yeah!  
Gaz: Can we stop talking about Keef? It's making me sick  
Ms. Bitters: Shut up, you're in detention  
Zim, Teth, and Dib: AWW!  
Gaz: *playing Gameslave2*  
*later...*  
Ms. Bitters: doom...doom...doom...doom...  
Zim: doom...doom...doom...do- OH I'M SICK OF SITTING HERE! CAN'T WE LEAVE?!  
Dib: Be quiet Zim. If it weren't for you, we would be home by now  
Teth: ...It was pretty fun, though...  
Ms. Bitters: *sigh* you're dismissed.  
Zim, Gaz, Dib, and Teth: YESSS!  
Ms. Bitters: Wait. An old enemy has returned. Beware. Especially you, Zim.  
Zim: Why? And who is this... enemy?  
Ms. Bitters: Tak. She's back on Earth and hungry for revenge.


	3. Chapter 3

**EDIT: date mistake thingy- is closed! madohmu0111 guessed and got it correct**

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: anyone who guesses the date mistake here correctly first gets request/comission for free/whatEVER thing ^^. And sorry, Teth's being a flirt here xD**

**Chapter 3: Tak is... back?!**

4:35:23, September 01. Location: front of Skool

Zim: *pale green and hyperventilating* Tak... Tak is...back?! Tak is alive... she wants my mission again... she's gonna be mad...  
Teth: Who's "Tak"  
Dib and Zim: *gaping at her*  
Dib: SHE TRIED TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!  
Zim: SHE TRIED TO TAKE OVER MY JOB!  
Gaz: she's okay...  
Zim: SHE'S EVIL! SHE'S MAD AT ME! SHE'S- *sees home* oh, hey, we're here. So um, see ya guys.  
Dib: Oh, see ya  
Teth: Hey, I thought you hated each other!  
Dib: Huh? Oh yeah! Um- I WILL DESTROY YOU, ALIEN! JUST YOU WAIT! I'LL SHOW THE WORLD WHO YOU REALLY AR- *gets hit by laser from gnome's eye* NAAY! *runs away holding eye painfully*  
Gaz: *sigh* might as well follow him *waves* see ya.  
Teth: see ya *goes to Zim's house and knocks on door*  
Zim: Who's there? The Halloweenies?! YOU CAN'T HAVE MY BLOOD!  
Teth: No, its me, Teth. And its April 25, Zim. There are no "Halloweenies", as you call it, out right now  
Zim: ...YOU'RE LYING!  
Teth: No really! Its me!  
Zim: *peeks through window* If you're sure...*unlocks door* Oh. What are you doing?  
Teth: You saw how my ship just crashed through the ceiling, right?  
Zim: ...yeah...  
Teth: Um... so can I borrow some equipment to fix it? Because, well... um, you know, we're leaving soon, and-  
Zim: Oh, of course, sure! Follow me *enters house*  
Teth: okay... *follows*  
Anon *runs over* Mistress! There you are! I've been-  
Zim and Anon: *stares at each other* ... *stares at Teth* ... *stares at each other again* WHO THE H*LL ARE YOU?! *stares at Teth* DO YOU KNOW HIM?! *stares at each other* WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!  
Teth: *separating them with hands* Whoa, guys. Calm down. Okay, Zim, this is my SIR unit, Anon, and Anon, this is Zim, an alien.  
Anon: I KNOW WHO HE IS! HE'S THE GUY THAT-  
Teth: *slapps hand over his mouth* STOP RANTING, ANON! *turns to Zim* Sorry, he's just...weird today. No need to worry  
Zim: ...okay? Hey! I think remember that SIR! But I don't know anything about him. How does he know me?  
Anon: *muttering* horribly disguised, not even an invader, kill-  
Teth: _Shut up, Anon!_  
Zim: ?  
*enters house, which was covered in waffles inside*  
Zim: GIR! WHAT DID YOU DO?!  
Gir: *smiles* I MADE WAFFLES!  
Zim: *facepalms and sighs* Elevator, take me to the storage room.  
*part of floor around Zim, Teth, Gir, and Anon disappears as they get into the elevator*  
*enters storage room*  
Zim: WHERE IS IT?! *throwing numerous stuff out of the way looking for a tool  
Gir: Whatcha doin', Master?  
Zim: Looking for that tool that can- OH THERE IT IS!  
Gir: YAAAAAAAAAAAY I WANT TACOS!  
Zim: ... *turns to Teth* so where's your ship?  
Teth: *teleports ship to her* right here *smiles*  
Zim: *gaping* HOW'DYOUDOTHAT?!  
Teth: Humans call it "magic", I call it powers. I don't know how, but I could do it since I got my PAK  
Zim: okay... *starts fixing ship*  
Gir: Is Gazzy here?  
Zim: *looks up* You mean Gaz? No, why would she be?  
Gir: I LIKE GAZZY AND TACOS AND I WANNA BE A MONGOOSE!  
Zim: ...Thats nice, Gir  
*30 mins later...*  
Zim: Finished! *looks proudly at ship, which looked as if never fell through the ceiling*  
Teth: HOW'DYOUDOTHAT?!  
Zim: Hyoo-mans call it "magic", I call it powers. I don't know how, but I could do it since I got my PAK *does u mad smile at Teth*  
Teth: *tilts head giving Zim smile* You stole my line!  
Zim: *smiles back mischievously* I know I did. I know.  
Teth: So, what are you gonna do once you get the world?  
Zim: Give it to the Tallest, get promoted, work for the Tall-  
Teth: Wait- you mean the new Tallest or the old Tallest?  
Zim: Oh. Um... well, I'd have to do the new Tallest, because I can't serve the old Tallest, but then if we're gonna murder the new Tallest, then maybe the old Tallest, so- *breaks off to the fact that Teth's cracking up*- hey, is this a trick question?!  
Teth: *pokes him* You're cute when you rant  
Zim: *blush*  
Teth: Well, anyway, I gotta go. Thanks for the repairs *looks at repaired ship admiredly*  
Zim: Aww, don't go! Oh. Okay, -um I'll see you tomorrow at school then, right?  
Teth: *winks* I wouldn't miss it! *hops into ship with Anon* See ya!  
Zim: See ya! *turns to Gir* Hey, do you think its hot in here or is it just me?


	4. Chapter 4

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: yaaay longest chapter yet ^^! 5 is complete and is comin in 5 seconds, 6 i just started but will be finishing soon!**

**Chapter 4: Something Strange...**

4:40:36, September 01. Location: Living room, Dib and Gaz's house

Dib: *holding eye* OWW! IT STINGS!  
Gaz: Shut up, Dib, I'm _trying_ to play a _game_  
Dib: I can't believe we're going to save the Tillest or whatever. We're helping the aliens that are trying to destroy us!  
Gaz: Oh well.  
Dib: GAZ! If we don't help them, the world will be saved! There won't be anymore invaders!  
Gaz: ...meh  
Dib: ...You don't care about a single thing I'm saying, do you?  
Gaz: Nope  
Dib: *sigh*  
Gaz: We should go, though. Earth is boring.  
Dib: But its our planet! We need to save it from alien invaders! And global warming! And ...GIANT WEENIE STANDS!  
Gaz: Just because Tak disguised her plan into a giant weenie stand doesn't mean all of them are evil (and besides, those were pretty good hot dogs).  
Dib: ...Don't mention her to me.  
Gaz: Tak?  
Dib: Yes, her  
Gaz: Why?  
Dib: Well, she believed (well, knew) that Zim was an alien, she listened to my pointless ranting about paranormal investigation, she hated Zim, I think she liked me, she-  
Gaz: *drops game and bursts out laughing*  
Dib: What?!  
Gaz: You think she liked you?! *falls off couch and ROTFLOLs*  
Dib: -she wasn't like YOU, you know. If she was my video game-obsessed little sister she wouldn't be laughing at me.  
Gaz: Oh, I'm sorry, I was supposed to think you were serious about that? *laughs some more*  
Dib: ... I'm just gonna ignore you  
Gaz: *finally stops laughing* Fine with me  
Dib: and, well... it felt like she was ...a friend  
Gaz: - oh stop acting all semental over her. It's making me sick  
Dib: Of course, you wouldn't know how it feels like-  
Gaz: -And I'm glad  
Dib: -to realize that your first actual friend was an alien trying to take over the world!  
Gaz: _...Or in my case, an alien's robot_  
Dib: ...Gaz? You're quiet. As in not-insulting-me-or-threatening-me-or-anything quiet. You okay?  
Gaz: Huh? Oh, yeah, you- um... er... big-headed paranormal investigator!  
Dib: My head's not big! Why is everyone saying that!  
Gaz: *holds up paper* It's in the script  
Dib: ... glad to see you're back to normal, then  
Gaz: ...  
Dib: ...  
Gaz: ...  
Dib: DAD!  
Professor Membrane: Shh! Not now, son! I am making...-  
Dib: Let me guess- toast  
Professor Membrane: No, actually it's english muffins. But close. Now what is it?  
Dib: Gaz is acting strange. She not insulting me or anything. I think she's ill.  
Professor Membrane: Don't tell me you made everything she eats besides stuff made from pig taste like pig again!  
Dib: No.  
Professor Membrane: You sent the walking dead after her again?  
Dib: No! ...And I said I was sorry about that!  
Professor Membrane: Then there's only one more possibility...  
Dib: WHAT IS IT?!  
Professor Membrane: She's in love  
Dib: *ROTFLOLs* Dad- you must be kidding me! That's even less likely than Ms. Bitters being nice to me!  
Professor Membrane: *gets angry* NEVER DOUBT THE POWER OF WORLD'S GREATEST SCIENTIST!  
Dib: *meep* ...sorry dad  
Professor Membrane: Quite alright, son. *goes back to making english muffins* Oh, by the way, your little foreign friend came over yesterday. He asked if it was alright if he could borrow some of our equipment to take over the world. That alright with you?  
Dib: DAD! HE'S NOT MY FRIEND, HE'S AN ALIEN!  
Professor Membrane: *laughs* of course he is  
Dib: HE'S TRYING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!  
Professor Membrane: Why, how interesting! Your friend has a lot of potential for someone your age. I can now see why you two and friends!  
Dib: HE'S NOT MY FRI- oh wait... can I come over to his house to um... hang out? You know, because he's my best friend?  
Professor Membrane: Why of course! Friendship gives you 30% more happiness in your life! (but 88% of stats are false)  
Dib: Great! I'll be going then! _Who knew having such a stupid dad could come to my advantage?_ *runs to Zim's house and knocks on door* Zim! Open up! Zi- *spaceship flies through gap that just opened in the ceiling* ZIM!  
Zim: *opens door* Yeah, what is it- YOU!  
Dib: Yes, it's me, I need to-  
Zim: Gir! Defend the base!  
Gir: *eyes glow red* YES, SIR!  
Dib: Zim! Listen to me! I-  
Gir: *leaps through window toward Dib's head*  
*super slowmo for effect*  
Dib: NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO  
Zim: YYYYEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS  
Gir: TTTTAAAACCCCCOOOOOSSSS *lands on Dib's head and eyes turn blue again*  
*slowmo effect stops*  
Gir: YOUR HEAD SMELLS LIKE A PUPPY! *hops off, eyes turn red, salutes Zim, and runs into wall*  
Dib: Zim! What are you doing with my father's scientific equipment?!  
Zim: *narrows eyes* And why should you know?  
Dib: It's my father's equipment!  
Zim: Good point. Building a machine to take over the world, what else? Except this time, I making sure you can't stop me by making the machine impossible for you to get within 2o feet of it without blowing up! *does evil laugh*  
Dib: ...Thanks for warning me then *backs away slowly*  
Zim: Oh, no prob. Hey wait! You weren't supposed to know that!  
Dib: _God, he's stupid!_ Why'd you tell me then?  
Zim: Good question... but I don't care!  
Dib: ... Um, anyways, what was that ship doing, flying out of your house?  
Zim: Teth's needed repairs. Why?  
Dib: I dunno. You do something to Gaz? She's not insulting me anymore. It's scary.  
Zim: Funny, Gir's been asking about her every five seconds.  
Zim and Dib: ...  
Zim: ...crap  
Dib: ...You know, I always wondered why she ran out of your house screaming with Gir chasing her during the Tak invasion...  
Zim: ...I better talk with Gir  
Dib: I'll come with you  
Zim: ?!  
Dib: I wanna know what's happened to her!  
Zim: *sighs irritatedly* _Stoopid hyoo-mans..._ Okay... follow me  
Dib: _Yes! And even better, I brought my video camera with me!_  
Zim: Gir! We need to talk.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Gir's secret**

5:03:16, September 01. Location: Base, Zim's house

Gir: *tilts head* Yes, Master?  
Zim: Do you have some... "connection" with Gaz?  
Gir: *scratches head* I DON'T know...  
Zim: Do you like her?  
Gir: I like waffles  
Zim: Yes but do you like HER?!  
Gir: I like her waffles  
Zim: *facepalm* GAZ MEMBRANE! NOT WAFFLES! GAZ!  
Gir: Ohhhhh  
Dib: *video taping base*  
Gir: Yea, I think so...  
Zim: Hmm... Gir, why did she run out screaming in the episode Tak, the Hideous New Girl?  
Gir: I was remote controlling Mimi...  
Zim: And...  
Gir: Gazzy was dancing with me...  
Zim: Poor Gaz... And...  
Gir: I went out and got some tacos...  
Zim: ?!  
Gir: *pouts* fine. Then Mimi (and me) messed up Tak's ship...  
Zim: And...  
Gir: I kissed Gaz.  
Zim and Dib: WHAT?!  
Dib: YOUR ROBOT KISSED MY SISTER?!  
Zim: DO YOU THINK I WANTED THAT TO HAPPEN?!  
Gir: Aww, but she's so nice! You just gotta give her a chance! And open up her head and sleep in it like a squishy little bed!  
Zim and Dib: *stare*  
Zim: I can't believe it  
Dib: Me neither  
Zim: HOW DARE YOU AGREE WITH ME!  
Dib: Sheesh Zim  
Zim: Never mind that, she's your sister, you deal with her  
Dib: Okay...?  
Zim: I need to prepare the ship. Gir! Stop thinking of Gaz and get ready! We leave tonight, when there is no moon!  
Dib: Wouldn't you need to leave on a full moon?  
Zim: No, the hyoo-mans will spot us  
Dib: Good point...  
Zim: Aren't you leaving? I'm busy now! We must head out!  
Dib: Oh, alright. See ya  
Zim: See ya  
Dib: _Yes! I got his entire base on camera! I'll just have to show it to the world and-_  
Zim: Hey! Gimme! *snatches camera* Hah! I knew it! You were filming me! *breaks in half and hands back to Dib* Just so you don't get any ideas... *evil smiles*  
Dib: _Ugh, I hate him! _*leaves*  
Gaz: We're leaving tonight, correct?  
Dib: Yes-  
Gaz: Good. I got Tak's ship ready  
Dib: But didn't it go crazy thinking it was me?  
Gaz: I got Zim to fix it  
Dib: ?! Oh well. Let's hope he didn't make it worse.  
Gaz: -Well, lets go! the guys are waiting!  
Dib: Sure but-  
Gaz: But what?  
Dib: I was going to ask you...do you like Gir?  
Gaz: No!  
Dib: He really did kiss you?  
Gaz: Full on the LIPS.  
Dib: You hate him for it?  
Gaz: Shut up or I'll rip off your arm and punch you with it  
Dib: _She's hiding something..._ Okay, I'll take that as a yes?  
Gaz: Whatever  
Dib: *walks into garage to Tak's ship and wakes it up* Wow... it looks great!  
Gaz: You gotta hand it to Zim, he can really work with these things  
Dib: ...Yeah, I guess. We're meeting them at the old weenie stand, right?  
Gaz: *nods*  
Dib: I hope Zim will be too obsessed with the mission to work on his plan...  
Gaz: What plan?  
Dib: He's making a machine to take over the world (as always) but I can't stop it without blowing up  
Gaz: Well, stop it then!  
Dib: No! Then I'll blow up!  
Gaz: That's the point  
Dib: *sigh*  
Gaz: ...This is boring  
Dib: Don't worry, we only have to wait *checks watch* ...three more hours  
Gaz: ngh

* * *

Zim: *working on plan*  
Gir: *zombie trance-like state* tacos...I want tacos...  
Zim: TACOS! WHY DO YOO WANT TACOS?! ITS FILTH EARTH FOOD AND- *goes on rant against Earth food* *pauses* Ah, well  
Gir: *turns on TV*  
Zim: *grabs alien fundip and sits on couch with Gir* What'cha watchin?  
Gir: Scary Monkey Show.  
Zim: OH THAT -HORRIBLE MONKEY!  
Gir: mm-hmm  
Zim and Gir: *sucks on fun dip stick thing while watching the Scary Monkey Show*  
Zim: ANYHOW! Back to my plan! *writes, then stops* Ummm...GIR! Make sure the hyoo-mans haven't chickened on us!  
Gir: *duty mode* YES SIR! *zooms away* *eyes turn blue* *turns around* *giggles like a maniac* HEEHEEHEE I'M NAKED! *grabs doggy costume, puts it on, and flies away*  
Zim: *sighs and facepalms*

* * *

Gaz: Has 3 hours passed yet? This is dumb  
Dib: *checks watch* only 2 and a half  
Gaz: Stupid watch... -?!  
Gir: *flying over* GAZZY! *crashes into her and hugs*  
Gaz: ...ngh  
Dib: Gir? What are you doing here?  
Gir: Master wanted me to make sure you're still here *smiles*  
Gaz: Tell "Master" that we've been waiting here for 2 hours!  
Gir: Yes, Gazzy *salutes and flies away*  
Dib: He sure likes you, doesn't he?  
Gaz: Oh shut up  
Dib: He does! I mean, he obeyed you like you were his MASTER  
Gaz: So?  
Dib: He HUGGED you. You never tolerate hugs  
Gaz: *annoyed* So?!  
Dib: He called you Gazzy  
Gaz: *punchs Dib while in the process dropping her GameSlave2*  
Dib: *falls back, glasses break, the GameSlave2 falls into a puddle and, buzzes, obviously broken*  
*Gaz could only watch is horror as her GameSlave2 broke*


	6. Chapter 6

**AUTHORS NOTE: i just finished at school :D! yes! Keef cameos and the like for fillers. sorry but i need fillers and i hate them TT^TT. i just started 7 so it might take a few days**

**Chapter 6: Delayed**

11:45:27, September 15. Location: Cafeteria, Skool

Dib: *plops lunch next to Teth, Zim, and Gaz*  
Zim and Teth: WHERE WERE YOU?!  
Dib: At the hospital. Gaz got mad  
Teth: So that explains why you were absent for 2 weeks? *gives him look*  
Zim: _Oh yeah, she hasn't met Angry Gaz yet_  
Dib: When she gets angry- *glances nervously at Gaz, who's glaring daggers at him* -she gets angry  
Teth: *gives wary look to Gaz* I see then...  
Zim: So you can't come? We can just leave you here? *smiles hopefully*  
Dib: *ignores Zim* ...Yeah. The good news is, as soon as the swelling goes down on my neck, I can make it  
Zim: *frowns angrily* CURSE YOOOOOOOOO!  
Teth: She doesn't look that unreasonable. What'cha do?  
Dib: I broke her Gameslave  
Teth: HOLY-  
Zim: You broke her Gameslave? Well, I say! That was horrible, Dib! I think Gaz should go murder you so we don't have to put up with you anymore *nudges Gaz*  
Gaz: I tried but then the FBI caught me  
Zim: Oh. Well- *stands on table and steps on Dib's sandwich* DOOM TO THE FBI!  
Random kids: *staring*  
*cricket cricket cricket*  
Zim: Oh- um, ...that's normal  
Random kids: *nodding like you nod to crazy people*  
Zim: *gets off table*  
Dib: *gets on table* SEE? HE'S AN ALIEN! AN ALIEN! WHO YELLS "DOOM TO THE FBI!" HUH? HUH? HUH?!  
Random kids: *not even paying attention*  
Zim: Come off it, Dib, no one cares I'm an alien-  
Random kids: *turns heads*  
Zim: -not that I am, of course-  
Teth and Gaz: _Saddest way of keeping your alien identity a secret I've ever seen_  
Dib: SEE? HE JUST ADMITTED HE'S AN ALIEN! SEE?!  
Random kids: *ignoring again*  
Zim: See what I mean?  
Dib: *sighs and gets off table*  
Teth: *whispering* Is he always like that?  
Gaz: *looks at Dib* *looks at Teth* *looks at Dib again* ...yeah  
Teth: Why bother saving the world if no one cares?  
Gaz: Exactly! I ask him that all the time! I mean, it's just stupid!  
Teth: ikr!  
Dib: -but it's right!  
Teth: So you stand for justice?  
Dib: Yes! Exactly!  
Teth: Peace?  
Dib: Yeah-  
Teth: Faith in the good ol' USA?  
Dib: Where are you going with thi-  
Teth: How about string cheese?  
Dib: ...what?  
Teth: You're right, Gaz, that _is_ stupid!  
Gaz: Yeah, but- what's with the string cheese?  
Teth: *tosses string cheese out the window*  
String cheese: *flies out, then back in, then cuts off Keef's head and flies back into Teth's hand*  
Gaz: YES! HE'S DEAD, JIM!  
Zim: Jim?  
Gaz: It's a human phrase- KEEF IS DE-  
Keef: Wow, my heads on the ground! Cool! *puts it back on his neck*  
Gaz: -never mind  
Teth: See what I mean?  
Gaz: Yeah. ...why'd you make me so happy for a second? I mean, he's dead. And then he puts his head back on and then its like it didn't happen.  
Teth: *spooky voice* One of the mysterious of the world...  
Dib: *looks at Teth strangely*  
Teth: It's true  
Dib: *still staring*  
Teth: ...  
Dib: *still staring*  
Teth: *backs away slowly*  
Zim: *machine gun comes out of his PAK* HEY KEEF!  
Keef: HIYA BUDDY! *runs toward Zim to hug*  
*another slow-mo effect*  
Zim: *pulls trigger*  
Keef: *gets hit square in the chest, blows into smithereens*  
*slow-mo effect ends*  
Zim, Teth, Gaz, and Dib: YESSSSSSSSSS!  
Keef: YAAAAY THAT WAS FUN, ZIM! WE SHOULD DO THAT AGAIN!  
Zim: OHSHIZ  
Zim, Teth, Gaz, and Dib: *runs out the window screaming*  
Teth: Is he immortal?! How did that not kill him?  
Zim: I don't know, but that was scary  
Dib: Scarier than when we had to hug each other in Return of Keef so he'd blow-up?  
Zim: ...no  
Gaz: Come on, why did I have to miss that?  
Teth: -wait- you hugged each other?!  
Zim and Dib: ...yeah  
Teth and Gaz: *rotflols*  
Zim: Really, though! I poured a happy-popping solution on him but he didn't blow until we went into- the most drastic of drastic measures  
Teth: *finally catches breath* Sorry, but you and Dib hugging each other is something to laugh about. *glances at Gaz* Or in this case, to rotflol.  
Dib: *also looks at Gaz* ...apparently  
Zim: *changing subject for- obvious reasons* Well, now that we're out of Skool, lets go travel to Irk to-  
*giant escape pod falls right in front of them*  
Random dude: Oh come on! We left the donuts?!  
Another Random dude: Purple, when we're running for our lives, do you really think we could have brought donuts?!  
Purple: But Red, think of the donuts!  
Red: Good point-  
Zim: *gaping* My Tallest?!


	7. Chapter 7

**AUTHORS NOTE: sorry for the late-ish update, i was typing chapter 8 (almost a sentence to go!) so fast i forgot i didn't post this ^^". and Ensu's made up. i needed something random**

**Chapter 7: Teth is a zombie?! (and other things that make no sense)**

**12:31:14, September 15. Location: front of Skool**

Red: Oh no...not you  
Teth: MY TALLEST?!  
Purple: Are you Teth? Aren't you... de-  
Teth: WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! Oh I mean- greetings, My Tallest *bows*. Did ya miss me?  
Purple: But I swear you were de-  
Teth: Seeing isn't technically believing, My Tallest  
Zim: My Tallest? What are you doing here? What's going on on Irk?  
Red: Nothing! Nothing at all! It's all great!  
Teth: -says one of the leaders of the irken race who just crash-landed out the sky.  
Purple: *turns to Red* Wasn't she de-  
Teth: -what happened?-  
Purple: -I'm pretty sure she di-  
Zim: I think you're hiding something, My Tallest-  
Red: No! We just wanted to, um... visit! Yeah! We wanted to visit you! And-  
Dib: YES! ALIENS! I BETTER GET OUT MY CAMERA-  
Red: Who's that large-headed kid?  
Dib: MY HEAD IS NOT-  
Gaz: EVERYONE SHUT THE F*CK UP OR I'LL PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE!  
*everyone shuts up*  
Teth: Please, My Tallest- WTF HAPPENED?!  
Red: *sighs* Fine, but don't get any ideas-  
Zim: -You were overthrown  
Red: -yes how'd you know? Anyhow, the control brain network went a bit out of control, nothing too serious, and um-  
Purple: You're lying Red, it was serious! I didn't get my donuts! The control brains totally beat the snot out of us, and it hurt when they strangled me! And the service drones went psycho and wouldn't get me my soda, and they just attacked so we had to flee and- *Red's covers his mouth with his hand* -mhh mff a myooo mhhr!  
Red: *laughs shakily* Purple, stop speaking nonsense, that never happened!  
Purple: Yes it did! And I have the scars from one of the control brain's wires to prove it!  
Teth: My Tallest, it's obvious Purple's speaking the truth. Stop trying to hide it-  
Purple: Yes! Someone believes me! Even if it is a zombie-  
Teth: I'm not a zombie!  
Purple: Then what are you?  
Teth: An Irken invader trying to conquer planet Ensu but was unfortunately pulled to Earth because of the gravitational pull of stupidity and nachos.  
Purple: Wait, I think I- wait nope I don't remember.  
Gaz: She got a point there. Earth is pretty stupid  
Dib: GAZ! How can you say that about our home planet?!  
Red: *looks at Dib and Gaz* Ah yes, the halfsies  
Dib: What?!  
Purple: Ohhh, you know, I've always wondered where Invader Membrane went-  
Dib: OUR DAD IS NOT AN INVADER!  
Red: Yes, he is, he just got married to a Earthian-  
Zim: -hyoo-man  
Red: -I knew that-  
Purple: So you two are halfsies!  
Dib: I'm part Irken?!  
Red: Yes! You are! How long does it take for you to get that through your enormously large head?!  
Dib: My head is not-  
Gaz: Shut up Dib!  
Red: So. Yoo...arrrreee...parrrrrt...irrrrrrrkennnnnnn...asssssssss...welllllll...asssssss...hyoooo-mannnnn.  
Gaz: So that explains why I have a squeedily-spooch!  
*cricket cricket cricket*  
Zim: ...moving on  
Purple: So, to get the story straight: Mr. I-don't-want-to-admit-we-were-beaten-up-by-robots *points to Red* and I need your help. How about it?  
Dib: Can I film you and prove to the human race you're aliens?  
Red: But you're one too!  
Dib: Good point... never mind  
Gaz: Are there any video games?  
Purple: That's the stupidest question I've ever heard.  
Gaz: *opens one eye* What?  
Others: *backs away slowly*  
Purple: That's the stupidest question I've ever heard.  
Gaz: *punches him in the face so hard he gets knocked out*  
Red: Whoa! *catches partner (cuz thats what friends do :) )* What he means is, H*LL YEAH!  
Gaz: I'm comin  
Purple: What about you, zombie?  
Teth: I'm not a zombie!  
Purple: Ghost?  
Teth: I'm not a ghost, either!  
Purple: Spirit? Phantom? Soul? Sprite? Corpse? Re-dead? Inferius?  
Teth: None of those  
Purple: But you're de-  
Teth: My Tallest, as I have already stated before, IAMANAVERAGEIRKENINVADERNOTA ZOMBIE,GH OST,SPIRIT,PHANTOM,SOUL,SPRITE,CORPSE,RE-DEAD,ORINFERIUSWHATDON'TYOUUNSTANDABOUTTHAT?!  
Purple: Okay... are you coming, then?  
Teth: Sure, whatever  
Red: This is exactly why I didn't want to tell them, Purple! We don't need a bunch of- shorties -to fight our battle!  
Purple: So we're just gonna fly around outer space fleeing from our own empire?! Come on, Red, think of the DONUTS! *turns to Zim* Will you come, Zim?  
Zim: ...No. I won't.


	8. Chapter 8

**Teth and Zim's history come together in this chapter (which explains why Teth's a zombie thingie) :). And no, Dib, SHIDIG-DOOS isn't a word XD (sorry i needed some weird word that wasnt real, so here ya go). Er... and about the "I'm coming for you" thing... one of my friends was hissing that in a high-pitched voiseto some random dude, so i got the idea when i was LMFAO-ing. chapter 9's comin soon only because of thankgivin break ;)**

**Chapter 8: You Lied!**

1:03:38, September 15. Location: front of Skool

Teth: What? You were obsessed with saving them since 2 weeks ago!  
Zim: They lied. THEY LIED TO ZIM!  
Dib: Lied about what?  
Zim: Everything! My mission! My job! My reason to serve them! MY SIR UNIT KISSED GAZ FOR NOTHING!  
Gaz: Wait- WHAT?!  
Red: Zim, listen to me-  
Zim: NO!  
Purple: You don't understand-  
Zim: SHUT UP!  
Teth: How did you find out? You'd never listen to Tak, Sizz-lorr, or anyone who tried to tell you  
Zim: Yes, but this was different...  
*Flashback dream thang :D)  
Random voice: *sweet, high-pitched* Zim? Zim? Where'd you go?  
Zim: Who are you? And what do you want with me?  
Random voice: Zim, don't you remember? Don't you remember me? *voice turns evil, but still high and sweet at the same time (how is that even possible?)* I'm coming for for you Zim. I'M COMING FOR YOU!  
Zim: STAY AWAY FROM MY BLOOD!  
Random voice: *turns confused* I'm- not after your blood  
Zim: *freezes and looks at her*  
Random voice: In fact, I- hate the taste of blood  
Zim: *still staring stupidly*  
Random voice: I'm irken, not a vampire  
Zim: *stops staring* Oh  
Random voice: *steps out of shadows*  
Zim: ...  
Random voice: Well?  
Zim: Oh! Right! *looks at script (XD)* *gasps* You! You're irken! What is this?!  
Random voice: Don't you remember me?  
Zim: Um...no  
Random voice: You couldn't have forgotten me that easily!  
Zim: But I honestly don't know!  
Random Voice: LIAR!  
Zim: No! Really!  
Random voice: God you're stupider than I remember  
Zim: What?!  
Random voice: You're stupider than I remember  
Zim: Eh?!  
Random voice: I CALLED YOU STUPID! NOW CAN WE GET ON WITH IT?!  
Zim: Sure, I guess... WAIT DID YOU JUST CALL ME STUPID?!  
Random voice: *facepalm* Just look into my eyes so we can warp to the past already!  
Zim: Okay... *looks into eyes*  
*Time warp starts*  
Past Zim: *running* We've got to get out of here!  
Past Unknown: *also running* Zim! We must face the truth. We'll never make it  
Past Zim: *smiles grimly* Still pessimistic as always, I see  
Past Unknown: We have no time! Our ships are to far away! We'll get shot!  
Past Zim: We'll make it! We must! *gasps as he gets grabbed by wire cable from someone's PAK*  
Past Unknown: *screams as also gets grabbed* ANON!  
Past Anon: *the jets in his feet activate, and he zooms toward his mistress until he's shot in the back, so he falls, broken*  
Control brain: Bring me the traitors  
Past Zim and Unknown: *dragged toward control brain, though struggling*  
Control brain: No use fighting, my children. No use...  
Past Unknown: *gasping for breathe* Let- go-  
Control brain: This is for your own good, child  
Past Zim: No! It was my fault, and mine alone! Spare her and punish me instead  
Past Unknown: Zim- no!  
Control brain: Don't worry Zim, you're time will come. But Invader Teth here has a power that I need to run our empire. With all the rebels lately, tsk tsk, someone needs to keep this place into control. And only Teth has that. Mind control. Powers of the mind. Everything I need for us to rule this universe.  
Past Teth: You're lying! You want to destroy us!  
Control brain: *narrows all 99 eyes* Another reason why I need your power. You two know way to much for your own good. But you should have know running away fro the problem only makes it worse, you fools! *whips knife at Teth's flesh, leaving a thin bloody slash mark from her face to her hip*  
Past Teth: *don't even have enough air to whimper as the control brain's wires strangle her*  
Past Zim: *screaming* STOP IT!  
Control Brain: Oh I can't, child. I must get my power, then I'll do you next. However- *screams as strange light strikes her, making her drop the two irkens* -what is going on he- *screams again, and then dies*  
Past Teth: *dying* Zim... you must promise me... you will leave me here... and you will never come back... and for your safety... for the empire's safety... you will fight the control brains, defeat every last one, and the universe will be saved... do you promise?  
Past Zim: No- don't leave... you're my only friend...  
Past Teth: Promise me...  
Past Zim: Not only that, you're the only one as short as me...  
Past Teth: Just promise me, darnit!  
Past Zim: Sorry- yes I promise  
Past Teth: Good. I love you...Zim *dies*  
*Time warp ends*  
Dream Teth: Now you see?  
Zim: Um... *thinks* ...no, not really  
Dream Teth: *facepalms* Lets get this straight. I DIED BECAUSE YOUR STUPID PLAN TO RUN AWAY! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT! NOW YOU WILL PAY!  
*flashback ends*  
Zim: ...and then I woke up screaming, but that was just because Gir was drooling in my face  
Teth: *looking confused, yet nervous* But I'm alive! Or at least I'm pretending to be...  
Zim: Yeah, I thought that too, but lets face it, you're partly see-through  
Teth: *looks at arm* I guess you're right...  
Dib: AWESOME! *points camera at Teth* I GOT A RECORDING OF A GHOST-ZOMBIE-ALIEN-THINGIE!  
Teth: *breaks camera* Sorry, but no  
Dib: Shoot  
Gaz: So let me get this straight; You two *points to Tallest* are the Irken leaders, Zim's an alien, Teth's dead (Teth: *scowls* Don't rub it in!), Tak's returned, control brains are the problem, my brothers a big-headed idiot halfsie(Dib: MY HEAD IS NOT BIG!), and I'm a video game playing halfsie with a squeedily-spooch and a love for pizza? Is that all?  
Others: ...I guess so...  
Gaz: *smiles evilly* THEN LETS BUST THESE MURDERIN' CONTROL BRAIN SHIDIG-DOOS!  
*cricket cricket cricket*  
Dib: ...is that even a word?


	9. Chapter 9

**AUTHORS NOTE: ...i blew it. the entire thanksgiving break i mah butt glued to the couch while i rp'd on feral heart. And i didn't do a bit of this. God, me. Anyhow. Zim isn't as brave as he seems, and the title speaks for Gir :D. That's all I'm gonna say. Back to FH.**

**Chapter 9: Gir on DRUGS**

2:30:46, September 15. Location: front of Skool

*rumbling coming from Skool*  
Red: Um, Zim? What's that rumbling sound?  
Zim: OH CRAP! The Skool children are running out now. RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!  
*group panics and runs someplace random*  
*kids stampede out of Skool*  
Purple: *clinging to a tree* I'm never coming here again  
Red: Wait a minute... just because of the dream of the past, you know think we lied to you  
Zim: Not exactly... oh yeah! Before, I couldn't remember, but I know that this metallic voice was talking to me and I felt the sensation of being strangled-  
Red: *whispering* Crap, he was hypnotized too?  
Purple: *whispering* Apparently... Wait, we can get him out of it, right?  
Red: *still whispering* I tried to with Mal and he hit me in the face!  
Purple: *still whispering* Never mind  
Red: This has got to be a dream! A horrible nightmarish dream! Zim! Pinch me!  
Zim: *shrugs* Okay *pinches*  
Red: *screams like a little girl, then looks around* Hmm... Zim! I still see you! Pinch me harder!  
Zim: *pinches*  
Red: *screams so loud that people in Australia could hear*  
Australian person: Ahoy, mate! What was that sound?  
Another australian person: Sounds like one of the leaders of the Irken race being pinched by the would-be invader, Zim, mate!  
(Just kidding)  
Another australian person: Sounds like a little girl, mate!  
Australian person: Oh no! What if its my daughter?!  
Another australian: We must go! *runs and crashes into tree*  
Red: *looks around again* *sees Zim and others* ...Purple... I'm scared...  
Teth: Enough about it already! Lets just get out of the middle of the road before we get spotted!  
Dib: *muttering* First logical statement I've heard this month  
Zim: Yes! Let's go! *marches toward his house*

* * *

Zim: *opens door*  
Gir: *zooms into his stomach* HIYA ZIMMEH!  
Zim: ?! WHAT IS THIS?! GIR! WHAT ARE YOU-  
Gir: *hugs Gaz* GAZZZZZZZZYYYYYY  
Gaz: Get off me or I will plunge you into a nightmare world in which there is no-  
Gir: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY I LIKE NIGHTMARE WORLDS!  
Gaz: ?!  
Gir: TETHY! DIBBEH! TALLESTEH!  
Teth: *backs away* Don't you dare hug me...  
Gir: *hugs*  
Teth: *prys off with crowbar and gives Gir to Dib* Here, you take him  
Dib: Huh?! Why me?! *gets him off*  
Zim: GIR! WHAT IS WITH YOU?!  
Gir: I like beer...  
Zim: ?!  
Gir: Beer is good...  
Zim: Oh, don't tell me you got into my beer supply!  
Dib: HA! Not only are you an illegal alien, literally, and trying to take over the world, but you're also an underage drinker! The police will hear about this!  
Zim: I'll probably die during the mission, and I quit taking over the world since I learned I was tricked *glares at the Tallest*  
Purple: Hey, we really didn't-  
Gir: *hugs* PURPLEH!  
Purple: ?!  
Red: *snickers* "Purpleh?"  
Gir: *hugs* REDDEH!  
Purple: *smirks* Oh, you're the one to talk  
Gaz: Am I the only normal person here?!  
Teth: *looks at Zim, the extremely stuck-up would-be invader; Gir, the SIR unit on drugs; Dib, the kid with the disturbingly large head; Red and Purple, who probably care most about nachos; and herself, the irken ghost with mind control, then sighs* Yeah, I guess  
Gaz: ? _What's with her?_  
Teth: _Nothing; absolutely nothing_  
Gaz: _Quit doing that!_  
Teth: _Sorry_  
Computer: Alert! Tak is in range- 96 million miles from our solar system  
Zim: Tak?!  
Others: He has a tracking device on her?  
Zim: *coughs* That's nice computer *glares, embarrassed*. Very pleasant indeed.  
Dib: *laughs* You're scared of her, aren't you?  
Zim: *blushes* Nonsense! How could I be scared of her?  
Gaz: *whispers to Teth*  
Teth: *nods and cast illusion to make her look like Tak*  
Zim: I mean, she's not even that powerful! And my plans were way better than that stoo-pid snack pla- *sees Tak illusion and runs away screaming*  
Gaz: *looks at video camera devilishly* This will go perfect on Youtube  
Teth: *changes back* Hide the camera, he's coming back  
Zim: *pretends he never ran* So, um...  
Others: *staring at him trying not to laugh*  
Zim: ...that's normal, you know  
Others: *crack up laughing*  
Zim: Well, wouldn't you be scared if she wants to kill you?!  
Teth: *stops laughing* Wait she wants to kill you?!  
Zim: Observe *motions to Computer*  
*picture of monkey disappears as a giant screen for messaging the Tallest comes up*  
*Tak goes on screen*  
Tak: You think you're finished with me?! Ha! I'm better than that, Zim! And you will pay! You will pay with your _life!_


	10. Chapter 10

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: FIN! just a lil filler, and fillers take me forever to do, but because the next part's with the Resisty (and a new OC as well) i might finish 11 soon :)(****but no promises). Oh, and Teth's not dumb, she just thinks that Dib's plain stupid (she's the second smartest of the three, Zim's obviously the dumbest. Who's the third, do ya think ;3?)**

**Chapter 10: The Mission Begins (finally!)**

4:53:19, September 15. Location: Zim's house

Zim: SEE?! I TOLD YOU! I GOT THAT MESSAGE 2 DAYS AGO! NOW I'M GONNA DIEITSGONNAHURTIDOWANNADIEUH RFUHRUWHkFfmjHFmJHS! *goes spazzing on the floor*  
Teth: *smacks him in the face with a charm, and he grows calm immediately* Okay. Here's the plan. We'll head to Irk. In the meantime, I'll put a spell on her tracking device to make it seem like you're on Earth. That should buy us some time before she catches up to us. And when she does- we'll think of something then. How does that sound?  
Zim: BRILLIANT! A PLAN ALMOST AS WORTHY AS MINE!  
Teth: *rolls eyes* Well lets just go. It's been 2 weeks, and this time, there's nothing to delay us  
Gaz: Finally! It gets boring without a Gameslave *glares at Dib*  
Dib: Hey! You were the one who-  
Zim: -Oh who cares! We gotta go before she finds me! Computer! Ready the Voot!  
Teth: Later *heads toward her base*  
Red: Well, lets go, Purp. And this time I'll steer  
Purple: Hey!  
Red: If it weren't for you, we wouldn't be here! On Earth! With- him! *points to Zim*  
Zim: *annoyed* I can hear you, you know  
Purple: Yes, but you were the one who wouldn't let me bring the donuts!  
*walks away to their ship bickering*  
Dib: Well, I guess I'll go too *heads to his garage to wake up Tak's ship*  
Gaz: *follows*  
Zim: Now... time to work on my next last evil plan *smirks*  
Dib: *zooms back* HEY! I HEARD THAT!

* * *

Dib: OH WOW! THIS IS SO COOL! I'M IN- I'M IN AN ALIEN SPACESHIP! I'M DRIVING AN ALIEN SPACESHIP! I'M EATING NACHOS WHILE SITTING IN THE ALIEN SPACESHIP WHICH I'M DRIVING! I'M-  
Teth: Shut your mouth, human. We have long-distance communication so I can hear every word you're saying. And its really messing up my driving.  
Gaz: And the only thing worse than that is to be in the spaceship he's in  
Teth: Thank god I have no brothers  
Gaz: Yeah. Irkens are lucky  
Teth: *shrugs* I guess  
Dib: *got a mysterious illness so he can only speak in caps lock xD* I KNOW, BUT I'M-  
Zim: Shut your noise tube, hyoo-man worm baby! I've heard enough of your filthy mouth, filled with- CORN!  
Dib: *noncaps* But I'm eating nachos  
Zim: LIAR!  
Teth: *rolls eyes* Oh boy  
Zim: GO HOME AND SHAVE YOUR FILTHY HEAD OF SMELL WITH YOUR BAD SELF!  
Dib: But I don't wanna go home  
Zim: Oh. Okay- WAIT! THATS TOO BAD!  
Gaz: Just shut up, you guys are making me sick  
Teth: And enough with the show quotes  
Gaz: Its making me sick  
Teth: Gaz. You just said a quote that was "making you sick"  
Gaz: You mean, It's making me sick?  
Teth: Yeah  
Gaz: Oh. Sorry  
Teth: Its alright. But those quotes were making me sick  
Gaz: LOL  
Dib: Are we there yet?!  
Teth: It took Zim 6 months to get to the earth from; how long is it going to take the get to Irk from Earth? *smirks* This can show how much you've been paying attention in math *whispers to Gaz* Do you think he has a brain in that giant head of his or not? Cuz I bet you 5 monies he can't compute it  
Gaz: *whispers back* Of course he can! Every human has to have a brain somewhere- unless you weren't paying attention in biology  
Teth: Good point. I was too busy snoring to pay attention to that lesson  
Dib: *ignores them* Are you kidding?! It would be six months of course!  
Teth: *jaw drops* He got it. *turns to Gaz and gives her the money* I see your brother has a brain after all  
Dib: *scowls*  
Zim: Wait, WHAT?! IMPOSSIBLE! THAT PIG-SMELLY CAN'T HAVE A BRAIN IN THAT THING!  
Red: What is with you two?!  
Zim: He's the only one who cares I'm an alien, and loathes me for my awesome supreme power of doom  
Purple: What happened to his head, anyway? Is it really that big?  
Dib: Hey! My head's not big!  
Red: *ignores* I dunno, buts its almost as big as the Massive, it seems  
Dib: It can't be that big!  
Teth: So you admit it  
Zim: No, of course it isn't as big as the Massive, My Tallest  
Red: ?  
Dib: Finally! Some truth!  
Zim: Because it's bigger than it!  
*Everyone besides Dib LOLs*  
Dib: AWWWWW QUIT MAKING FUN OF MY HEADDDDDD *runs out of the room*  
Teth: He's in a ship; he can't run out of the room  
(Oh yeah. Sorry. Writer's mistake.)  
Gaz: Guys  
Teth: Hmm?  
Gaz: There's a ship out there. And it's stalking us  
Red: *turns around* Oh no, not them  
Zim: Who is it?  
Purple: The Resisity


	11. Chapter 11

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: wow, 11 already?! anyhow, i am just so proud of the really short speech i made for Gaz in this chapter. Gir is just like me; he hides his loneliness and sadness behind a mask of fake craziness and happiness. I can tell, becuase of the ep Gir goes crazy and stuff, and because i know it is literally impossible to be that happy unless you're faking. Oooh, who's the mysterious person at the end? *shot***

******Chapter 11: The Resisty has returned! (who cares)**

6:57:23, October 9. Location: Outer Space

Lard Nar: Okay, this is it! Because we totally failed during the first mission, we're starting over. A new ship, a new name *glares at Spleenk*, and a better plan!  
Others: Aww! We liked that name  
Lard Nar: The Resisty?! That's just stupid! I wanted something scary!  
Shloonktapooxis: How 'bout the Pirate Monkeys?  
Lard Nar: I told you before, NO!  
Spleenk: We should keep the Resisty!  
Others: Yeah!  
Lard Nar: *sighs* Fine!  
Others: HURRAY!  
Lard Nar: But anyhow- I still can't believe the Tallest are out here! But now, it will be easier to attack, because their ship's all tiny now! So, Shloonktapooxis, fire the laser! We must-  
*call from the Tallest*  
Lard Nar: THEY'RE HAILING US! GET READY!  
Red: Hello? Mr. Thai food guy? Hello?  
Lard Nar: *deep voice* We- are the RESISTY!  
Purple: Yeah-yeah we know  
Lard Nar: And I'm not a thai food guy!  
Red: Well, Lard Nar is a type of thai food, so what the heck, right?  
Lard Nar: But I am the leader of the Resisty! I am no thai food!  
Purple: Wait- the Resisty?  
Lard Nar: Yes, we-  
Purple: I still think that's a stupid name  
Lard Nar: *voices turns back into the high british accent we all love :)* I TOLD HIM IT WAS STUPID!  
Red: Why do you even listen to him?  
Lard Nar: *scratches head* I dunno  
Red: *blinks* DESTROY THEM!  
The Resisty: *screams like a little girl*  
Lard Nar: Stay calm! We must defeat them while they still aren't in the Massive!  
Shloonktapooxis: *bangs head on Lard Nar's chair and starts crying and screaming* WE'RE GONNA DDIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! *rolls on the ground* Idonwannadieeeeee  
Lard Nar: THE LASER!  
Shloonktapooxis: *perks up* Oh right *starts hitting button*  
Teth: Who are they, exactly?  
Red: A resistance- if you could even call it that  
Gir: YAAAAAYYYY I'M GONNA BE SICK!  
Anon: *facepalms* Lord help me...  
Dib: Hey wait a minute- according to my research, that thai food guy's a vor-  
Gaz: NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR STUPID RESEARCH!  
Dib: Well, he's a vortian  
Lard Nar: *stops screaming* And one of the only ones left, too. And I'm still not a thai food guy!  
Dib: And what's with your legs, anyway? They're all... zig-zaggy  
Lard Nar: *looks at his legs* I guess, but- THIS IS NO TIME TO COMMENT ABOUT MY LEGS! I'm trying to destroy the Almighty Tallest!  
Anon: Because they destroyed almost all the Vortians and forced the survivors into slavery?  
Lard Nar: Yes, exactly. How'd you know all that?  
Anon: Unlike that- defective *points to Gir* I am a real Standard Information Retrieval unit

(Denial~)

Anon: _Oh shut up_  
Zim: Did you just call my robot a defective?!  
Anon: It's true  
Zim: *looks at Gir, who's running around screaming for Lord knows why* Okay, so maybe you're right...  
Gaz: He's not really a defective though...  
Zim and Dib: ?!  
Gaz: *looks at Gir* He's just really messed up.  
Teth: *raises eyebrow* ?  
Gaz: And who could blame him? He was made out of trash, for Pete's sake!  
Zim: Good point...  
Gaz: But look, all I'm saying is, we're all messed up in our own way. We're all idiots in different ways. His is just different than most, and you need to respect that. He isn't defective, he's... Gir. *as she was speaking, she looked over at Gir, who stopped running around to listen*  
Others: *complete silence*  
Dib: I... never thought of it that way before...  
Gir: *staring at Gaz, but without any emotion he has usually had, no drugs, evil, or craziness in his eyes, only a feeling that he wasn't alone, and that someone was understanding him for once*  
*All ships, including the Resisty's, are shot suddenly*  
Red: ?! What was that?! Were you attacking?!  
Lard Nar: No, I was listening to that young purple-haired child  
Purple: We're being attacked! Put up the defenses!  
Shloonktapooxis: WE'RE GONNA DIE!  
Lard Nar: Listen, Shloo, for the last time. WEARENOTGONNADIEWHYDOYOUKEEP SCREAMINGTHATITSGE-  
TTINGONMYNERVES!  
Shloonktapooxis: Ooooh. That's a large laser behind us  
Lard Nar: *spins around to see a humungous laser* ...WE'RE GONNA DIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  
Teth: _So much for not dying_  
Lard Nar and Shloonktapooxis: WE'RE GONNA DIE!  
Spleenk and Ixane: WE'RE GONNA DIE!  
Zim and Dib: WE'RE GONNA DIE!  
Red and Purple: WE'RE GONNA DIE!  
Gaz and Anon: Are you kidding me  
Teth: Guys, its just a large laser. Its not shooting relax  
Zim: Okay *relaxs*  
*laser shoots*  
*all ships suddenly plunge down to a random planet*  
Dib: *sarcastic* Yes, Teth. We are NOT going to DIE. I'll RELAX now.  
Teth: I stand corrected, then  
*everyone lands*  
?: A silly illusion couldn't stop me from finding you, Zim  
Zim: *sweatdrops* Sh*t


	12. Chapter 12

**EDIT: Killing the part thing. This is the 12 chap, for f*ck's sake. This is a 21-chapter book. If this is the 1ST PART, I'd hate to see when the second would end. Cuz it WOULDN'T.**

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes, there will be parts. I like the Hunger Games**

**Chapter 12: YAY! ALIEN SPACE FIGHT!**

10:50:03, October 9. Location: Random Planet

Dib: TAK?!  
Tak: Oh hello, Dib. Step away, I have some unfinished business with ZIM!  
Zim: Tak! I hoping you'd stop by, I would like to tell you- ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! I MEAN, REALLY HOW CAN A WOMAN HOLD A GRUDGE FOR THAT LONG?! THAT'S JUST PATHETIC! YOU STINK! I WAS PLANNING ON SAVING THE IRKEN EMPIRE AND I DIDN'T NEED YOU TO DROP YOUR FILTHY HEAD IN TO PRETEND YOU'RE BRAVE ENOUGH TO BATTLE THE LIKES OF ZIM!  
Tak: *facepalms* Okay. We could do this the easy way or the hard way. Leave the Earth and never come back, as I will conquer it as soon as you're gone. Or, I can pound you flat into the ground and make your pay for stopping my plan!  
Zim: Fool! I am ZIM! NEVER WILL I SURRENDER THE EARTH TO SOMEONE LIKE YOU! THE EARTH IS MINE TO DEVASTATE! And I've already promised the moon to Gir  
Teth: *can tell he's scared* _Man, he's good at faking at being brave_  
Tak: Alright. Prepare for your doom, Zim!  
Zim: Hey. That's my line  
Tak: *shrugs* Okay? But anyhow! Be ready to lose, Zim! I will not bow!  
*epic fight of randomness starts*  
*both gets into ship, guns at the ready*  
Zim and Tak: *flies ships toward each others and collides*  
Tak: *immediately flies her ship above Zim's, spins around, and shoots*  
Zim: *his ship gets hit, but flies back up and fires toward her*  
Tak: *hisses as part of her ship's burned, and flies toward his*  
Zim and Tak: *ships collide again*

* * *

*2 hours later...*  
Zim and Tak: *still fighting*  
Gaz: I'm bored  
Teth: *eating popcorn* Ikr  
Purple: To be honest, I liked Tak's plan  
Red: *rolls eyes* Only because of the snacks  
Dib: But she was destroying my home planet!  
Red, Purple, Teth, and Gaz: So?  
Dib: ALL MANKIND WOULD HAVE BEEN DESTROYED  
Teth: Yay  
Dib: *looks at her* You are a strange, strange little ghost alien thing  
Teth: I'm not little! I'm 114!  
Dib: ?! You're old Teth  
Teth: And how old are you?  
Dib: 12  
Teth: *snorts* You're barely even a smeet! Is it even legal to send you to Skool?!  
Gaz: Just a big time difference, I guess  
Red: It would have to be. No one that young could be qualified as anything older than a smeet  
Dib: !  
Purple: You know, Red, after like, 50 years, of being Tallest, I never asked your age  
Red: Hey... you're right. So how old are you, anyways?  
Purple: 127  
Gaz: *mouth dropping open* !  
Red: *laughs* Me too!  
Gaz: Holy-  
Dib: Huh? What is it, Gaz?  
Gaz: *wordlessly points to Zim*  
Zim and Tak: *now out of their ships, Tak fighting Zim with her bare hands, which are covered with Zim's blood*  
Zim: *weakly pulls gun and shoots at her, and gets her left arm*  
Tak: *hits him with a laser in the eye*  
Dib:*stares, shocked* Pretty intense  
Teth: *staring, non-blinking, in shock at them* You don't say?  
Tak: *lifts gun, ready to strike for the last time*  
Zim: *crippled on the ground, because of a shoot on his leg* *picks up his gun as well, points it and her and prepares to shoot*  
Dib: STOP! *runs over and stands in front of Zim*  
Zim: What are you doing?! SHE'S MINE TO DESTROY!  
Dib: *turns to Tak* You can't kill him!  
Tak: *narrows eyes* Why shouldn't I?  
Dib: We're on a mission to destroy the control brains that have taken over the Irken empire! We need Zim to lead us! For peace! Justice! Faith in the good ol' USA! And STRING CHEESE!  
Teth: _There goes my lines_  
Dib: *looks at Zim* But, I still hate him, so you're free to destroy him or torture him or whatever. It's fine with me  
Tak: *silent*  
Dib: So... make your choice. I mean, I'm fine either way  
Tak: *looks at the Tallest* Is this true? Do you really need this- this- horrible- *sighs because she can't think of any good insult* -oh never mind  
Red:*looks at Zim*  
Purple: *looks at Tak*  
Red: We don't need him-  
Tak: *immediately raises gun*  
Red and Purple: -but don't shoot  
Tak: ?!  
Red: We owe him-  
Purple: - the privilege to be an invader  
Zim: *lifts head* ?!  
Tak and Dib: So that means-  
Zim: *jumps up* YES! I KNEW THIS DAY WOULD COME! HEAR ME, DIB-MONKEY, YOUR PLANET WILL FALL UNDER THE WRATH OF ZIM! *does victory dance*  
Teth: *looks at the Tallest* What have you gotten yourselves into?!  
Red and Purple: We don't know *looks at Zim, shakes heads, and laughs* We just don't know


	13. Chapter 13

**EDIT: WHOO, now it has a name! Xolorians! Same species as the aliens in NotFM (cats with powers ^^", though different a bit). Meh. The ending is a complete copy of chapter 8 TT^TT. oh well. And heehee, someones a prankster ^^. IAD (aka SOD for Spirit of Doom, one of my characters on FH) is a prankster, and is grateful to Riena for saving his life (er- he was a ghost, so second life- or something like that), but that doesn't mean he has to listen to her, now does he :D?**

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: 130+ VIEWS?! THANK YOOUUUUUUUUU 8D! new characters coming, sy comes later, but riena and IAD show up here. riena's a vortian and IAD is this alien species i mad up but doesn't have a name. oh well. **

Chapter 13: Sy, IAD, and Riena

2:05:06, October 10. Location: Random Planet

Tak: THEY- WHAT?!  
Teth: They were overthrown by a bunch of control brains, they went to Earth on accident, and now here we are  
Dib: *looks and Zim, then Tak* Tak? Can I shoot Zim now?  
Tak: *glares* NO! HE'S MINE!  
Zim: *completely oblivious to the others, doing a Snoopy happy dance, humming something that sounds a lot like "HOLY IRK, I'M AN INVADER!"*  
Tak: So, you know who did it?  
Gaz: What do you mean?  
Tak: Control brains can't do that. They don't have to power to. They were created to assist the Tallest, not annihilate them  
Teth: I think I've narrowed it down  
Dib: To who?  
Teth: Sy  
Red: *looks up* Wait, he's the short guy with the green eyes, right?  
Teth: *nods grimly* The guy responsible for my death  
Red: So all we have to do is fly to Irk and kill him, right?  
Teth: Well, I-  
Red: I gotta tell Purple! *turns to Purple, who's in the Tallest's ship, fighting the Resisty (Finally! I mentioned them again! It was about time!) single-handedly and eating donuts at the same time* PURP! WE'VE GOT A- wait, WTF are you doing?  
Purple: Fighting the Resisty  
Red: AND WHERE'D YOU GET THOSE DONUTS?!  
Purple: Tak's ship  
Tak: There were donuts in my ship?  
Purple: Yeah  
Red: *looks at the others, then Purple, then the others again* DONUTS! *runs to Purple*  
Gaz: ...moving on...  
Dib: Who's Sy, anyways?  
Teth: My killer, my and Zim's used-to-be best friend, and *breathes deeply* my ex  
Dib: ?! YOU'RE-  
Teth: *holds hand up in defense* I'm 117 years old. I'm allowed to date, you know  
Dib: YES, BUT-  
Teth: *holds up fist* Shut up or I'll-  
Gaz: -plunge you in a nightmare world in which there is no waking  
Teth: ...yeah, that!  
Dib: *meep* okay  
*Tallest and Resisty's ships fall to ground*  
Shloonktapooxis: Wheeeoh, did anybody think that was cool? Please respond! *sticks out tongue*  
Purple: Oh god *rolls eyes*  
Lard Nar: Hey, that's weird. Our ship doesn't have a scratch yet its broken down  
Purple: But I've been shooting at you for the past ten minutes!  
Lard Nar: _Oh yeah... _*smirks* We have a shield app now  
Purple: On you or the ship?  
Lard Nar: On the ship, of course! What type of idiot do you take me for?  
Purple: *grins and holds up giant machine gun*  
Lard Nar: *grabs his machine gun*  
Purple and Lard Nar: *starts firing at each other*  
Teth: Oooh! Another fight! *grabs popcorn*  
Gaz: Why do you like fights so much?  
Teth: *still watching fight* I'm a sadist  
Gaz: *backs away slowly, then stops* Wait, cuz you're a sadist, you like to kill people right?  
Teth: I guess  
Gaz: Can you kill Zim then? He's freaking me out  
Teth: *shrugs and ignores the question*  
Tak: I will!  
Gaz: Okay, then, shoot him already  
Zim: *stops going hyper* Wait what?  
Tak: *smiles* They're finally letting me kill you  
Zim: But I just became an INVADER! Kill ZIM some other time!  
Tak: Okay. After your mission. Promise?  
Zim: Promise  
Tak and Zim: *shakes hands, then screams and runs away from each other* GERMS! I'VE GOT GERMS!  
Teth, Gaz, Red, and Dib: *cracks up*  
Purple: *stops shooting suddenly* I'm bored  
Lard Nar: *also stops shooting* Me too  
Purple: So, ...wonderful day, this morning, isn't it?  
Lard Nar: Yes, it is... Just look at how beautifully the sun peeks behind that cloud  
Purple: Yeah. Wonderful. Like a donut  
Lard Nar: *tilts head* You're right...  
Ixane: *whispers to Lard Nar* Why are you speaking with the enemy about the weather?!  
Lard Nar: I'm bored  
Red: *walks, or rather, hovers to their ship* Why is our engine missing?!  
Lard Nar: Hey, our's is too  
?: *random high-pitched giggling coming from behind a large sculpture*  
Other ?: Really, just stop it, IAD. Its annoying and rude  
IAD: But fun! I mean, did you see their faces?! The tall guy's just like, "Why is our engine missing?!" 15 minutes after I took-  
Red: *reaches out behind the sculpture and grabs IAD*  
IAD: *scowls* What's with you, tall irken? Can't take a joke  
Red: *glares*  
?: Please excuse him, My Tallest. He meant no harm *glances at IAD*  
Teth: *gasps* Riena?!


	14. Chapter 14

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: This will be the last update till January. I'll be on vacation :D. So (as Jane Smith from Wayside School says), rub a monkey's tummy! You heard me! RUB A MONKEY'S TUMMY WITH YOUR HEAD! And, no, I didn't forget to block hell. Hell is just a place, for f*cks sake. Er- when you say it like the place. It's a curse word only when peeps are like "What the h*ll". You know. Oh, and lardy's a neeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrdddddd ddddd XD**

**Chapter 14: Insane and Dangerous**

2:37:19, October 10. Location: Random Planet

Riena: Teth? Where have you been?! I thought you were still in the Underworld!  
Dib: _Underworld?_  
Teth: Oh, I escaped (thank god!)  
Riena: But how? I mean, we were knocked unconscious and when I woke up you were gone!  
Teth: Well, it's a long story  
IAD: Who is she?  
Riena: I met her before I saved you  
IAD: *fur stands up* I didn't need to be saved, you know! I handled them perfectly!  
Riena: *rolls eyes* If you mean, being tied to a pole is handling cannibalistic monsters well, then yes, you did  
IAD: *crosses arms and looks away, irritated*  
Dib: The- Underworld? How did you even get there in the first place?  
IAD: Inferior living being  
Riena: Well, the thing is, we're dead-  
Gaz: What's all the dead people all of a sudden? It's making me sick  
Tak: *sighs*  
Teth: -And we were traveling to the Other Side (aka heaven), but we had to pass through the Dark Side (aka hell) and, you know-  
Riena: -There's monsters and demons and things who like to eat souls passing through. And we finally got through, but then we couldn't go in the Other Side  
Teth: Unfinished business in the universe, or something like that *shrugs*  
Zim: This is just- crazy!  
Red, Purple, and Lard Nar: *nods slowly* You don't say?  
Teth: Oh whatever *shrugs again*  
Zim: Oh well. *glares at Tak* Thanks for sabotaging the ships, Tak  
Tak: *raises hands in mock surrender* Geez, Zim, lay off, will ya?  
Zim: No worries, invader ZIM will use his masterful repair skills and we'll go out soon enough  
Gaz: Hoboy *facepalm*

* * *

(1 hour later...)  
Zim: -So, I'm just like, 'You wanna piece'a me?' and she says, she says right back to me, she says-  
Riena: Oh shut up will you?  
IAD: Yeah, you're even more annoying than me! Wait-  
Zim: Hey! That's my quote!  
IAD: Oh whatever  
Zim: Don't you 'whatever' me!  
*Both start arguing rapidly*  
Teth: *listens to fight without interest* Who do you think's more crazy?  
Riena: IAD. He's not named Insane and Dangerous for nothing, you know  
Gaz: How can something that tiny be much of a threat?  
Riena: Explosive powers. Honestly, it's crazy.  
Dib: ?  
Lard Nar: Xolorians, though tiny and calm creatures, have an extremely strong amount of energy, which can be converted into nuclear energy. Rarely are some born defective,-  
Gaz: *stiffens at the word*  
Lard Nar: -and when they are, they can't control their powers and must be abandoned at birth, for no Xolorian clan can have a defective in their clan, because of the danger.  
Teth: Are you sure your mother wasn't an encyclopedia?  
Lard Nar: *shrugs* It's what being trapped in a research prison for 50 years does to you  
Purple: *coughs* Nerd  
Lard Nar: *scowls*  
Dib: Hey! What's with that planet? *points out window to a dark gray planet, no life on it, piles of jagged stones where a city looked like it should have been*  
IAD: *stops arguing with Zim and looks out window* That's my home planet!  
Red: Holy Irk  
IAD: *glares at the Tallest* Did you send out another one of your stinking invaders to destroy my planet?!  
Purple: We've never even heard of it!  
Gaz: The new Tallest must have attacked it  
Red: -Shortest. He was a midget, that one  
Zim: I guess you could say *shrugs*  
Tak: *stiffens* Wait, how much service drones do you have exactly, my Tallest?  
Purple: Um... *thinks* I dunno, like 3,000?  
Red: 3,742 to be exact  
Tak: Oh no Have they been hypnotized yet?  
Purple: Yeah, wh- AAAAAAAAAAAAH WE'RE GONNA DIEEEEEE  
Lard Nar: That's my quote!  
Purple: I DON'T CARRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEE  
Tak: *stares wide-eyed* We need at least their number of reinforcements, plus tons of machine guns  
Zim: ...crap  
Gir: YAAAAAAY WE'RE DOOMED!  
Zim: No, Gir, that's bad  
Gir: Oh. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!  
Teth: *facepalm* How have we been so stupid?  
Dib: I don't know...  
Gaz: Why can't you think of something with that enormous head of yours?!  
Dib: My head's not-  
Teth: Wait! That's it! *whispers plan to Gaz*  
Gaz: Yes! Brilliant!  
Dib: What are you planning?!  
Teth: Oh Dib, would you be so kind to let us fire you through a cannon to attack the Irken planet?  
Dib: What? No! I'd  
Gaz: Okay *turns to Zim* Start the cannon  
Dib: But I said-  
Zim: *salutes* Yes, sir  
Gaz: I'm a girl  
Zim: YOU LIE!  
Tak: *rolls eyes*  
*giant gun fire*  
*huge metal claws hook onto the ships*  
Mysterious metal voice: Stay where you are, and do not fight back. You are now prisoners of the new Irken Empire.


	15. Chapter 15

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: WOOOOO back from mah trip. it almost got cancelled cuz my sib got sick but it didnt thank god. i got the plot set all up and this is gonna be a trilogy! i was so bored cuz i couldn't type this, and the plane ride was so horrible. i gotta go right now, but next chap comin soon!**

**Chapter 15: The New Irken Empire**

5:03:28, October 10. Location: Xoloria, the prison planet

Zim: *rams himself into cage door*  
Teth: *sighs* Zim, for the last time, that won't do anything  
Zim: *ignores and keeps ramming*  
Tak: Really, Zim! Stop it! it's freaky!  
Zim: *stops ramming suddenly* Well, this isn't doing anything, so I guess I'll stop  
Tak: *facepalm*  
Teth: Well, maybe lasers? *fires a laser from her PAK, but it bounces off and almost hits her* Okay, maybe not... *rubs singed antennae tip*  
?: *snickers* You can't get out, if you haven't noticed. It's foolproof.  
Dib: *spins around* Wha? Who are you?!  
?: God, You can't expect only yourselves in here, you know. Thousands of other rebels were caught, too. *hesitates* And even more are dead*  
Red: Identify yourself!  
?: I am Zora, the-  
Teth: Wait! You're that witch who told the prophecy about the three saving the universe or whatever!  
Zora: *scowls* I prefer not to be called that  
Zim: What witch?! I don't remember anything about a witch!  
Anon: *rolls eyes* Of course you don't  
Gaz: _He has the memory of a coconut, that one..._  
Teth: _I agree_  
Gaz: *leaps up suddenly, then sits down*  
Purple: What's with you?  
Gaz: Just forgot Teth was a mind reader/um... oh forget it  
Zim: Forget what?  
Anon: *facepalm* Zim, to say that you have the worst memory of anything created would be an understatement  
Zim: NEVER! I AM ZIM!  
Teth: *ignores* And you said that- umm...  
Zora: - a great darkness is coming, with nothing anyone can do to stop it, yet three shall rise and change the universe forever (lol that sounds like NotFM), lots of peeps are gonna die, the plots gonna last three books, the Almighty Tallest will-  
(Hey, watch it Zora; you'll reveal the whole plot!)  
Red: The Almighty Tallest will what?  
Zora: *talking to me* Hey, you're the one that wrote it!  
Zim: Wrote what? Who are you talking to?  
(Yeah, but you said it!)  
Zora: I can't say it if you didn't type it!  
Riena: Type- wait, are we in a book?!  
(A fanfic, actually. With 210 views. THANKS FOR THE VIEWS!)  
Dib: GUYS! WE'RE ON THE INTERNET! WE'RE FAMOUS!  
IAD: Not really...  
Purple: But the Almighty Tallest will what?  
Zora: *still talking to me* Oh, now you've done it!  
(pfft. Sorry Purp, that was a spoiler)  
Purple: *whining* TELL ME! I'm your leader! I can send you into a sun!  
(As soon as you get out of that cage)  
Purple: grr  
Zora: Anyhow, lets just get back to the script  
Teth: Kay. *looks at script, then at Zim*  
Zim: What?  
Teth: Say your lines!  
Zim: *flips through script* I can't find my page!  
Tak: Oh, f*ck  
(Take two)  
Zim: Wait! Here it is!  
(Oh you little-)  
Zim: *grabs cage bars and shakes them* I am an irken invader! And irken invaders shouldn't be held like a monkey in a cage!  
Riena: ...a monkey?  
Teth: It's an Earth creature  
Riena: Oh  
Zim: I have to get out of here! But how?  
Gir: YOU GONNA MAKE BISCUITS?! YOU GONNA MAKE BISCUITS?! YOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUU GONNA MAKE BISCUITS?! YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUU UUUUU GONNA MAKE BISSSSSSCCCCCCCCCUITTTTTTTTT TTTTSSSSSS?!  
Zim: ...I told you I never want you to mention biscuits again  
Gir: Okeeeeeeeeeey-dokeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyy  
Zora: *freezes* Sh*t  
Dib: What?  
Zora: They'll be executing us tomorrow  
Shloonktapooxis: WE'RE GONNA DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! *bangs himself against Lard Nar*  
Red: How do you know that?  
Zora: I predict the future  
Red: I see... You sure you can't tell what's gonna happen to us?  
Zora: I'd love to, really, but the Fox censors won't allow it  
Zim: Was that Yakko?  
Zora: *looks at the ground* ...I read it on the bathroom wall  
Dib: NOO! THIS IS REMINDING ME OF THE HALLOWEEN SPECTACULAR OF SPOOKY DOOM!  
Zim: The Halloween Spectacular of Spooky Doom?  
Dib: The episode when we were trapped in my head running from monsters  
Teth: And I had to miss it?! WHY MUST THIS BE?!  
Gaz: Why couldn't you just stay in your head? The universe would be much better  
Tak: How would that change the predicament we're in?  
Gaz: Good point...  
Zim: *puts head in his hands* How in the world are we gonna get out?!  
Lard Nar: Finally! *holds up the piece of paper he was writing on* I have a plan!


	16. Chapter 16

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: im on a dif computer so its so weird but- i woke up at 2 AM with the plot for the next 2 chaps, so they'll come fast. srry it it me longer that last time, but hey, this is my average. plus, im jetlag (still). **

**Chapter 16: A jailbreak, a square down, and yet more idiots talking about "The One"**

05:48:54, October 10. Location: Xoloria, the prison planet

Zim: *reads plan* Brilliant! A plan almost as worthy as one of my own!  
Tak: *rolls eyes* Oh, for f*ck's sake-  
Riena: Wow, this is amazing  
Lard Nar: *shrugs* Thanks, but it was noth-  
Zim: *narrows eyes* Nothing... or an epic plan of doom?  
Lard Nar: *sighs* Please, just stop it, Zim  
Zim: Sorry  
Dib: But how in the world are we gonna distract the guard?  
Lard Nar: *looks at them for a real long time and sighs* Just be yourselves, alright?  
Zora: Guys! Places! The guard's coming!  
Guard: SHUT UP, YOU PRISONERS!  
Teth: We weren't speaking  
Guard: YEAH YOU WERE!  
Gaz: Are there any video games around here?  
Guard: NO! THERE'S NOT!  
Gaz: That's stupid  
Guard: STOP SPEAKING, PRISONER 46-37!  
Gaz: Maybe tomorrow  
Guard: I SAID SHUT UP!  
Anon: Hey, can _you _shut up? My ears will truly thank you  
Guard: THAT'S I-  
Tak: *whips out laser and shoots him*  
Guard: *falls over dead*  
IAD: *reaches through bars and grabs the keys, then unlocks the door to the cages*  
*tons of prisoners blink, eyes acknowledging him and the ones that freed them, nodded and went out of the prison*  
Teth and Zim: *heads out through tunnel opposite to exit*  
Zim: *looks at map* So we take a left, then a right, then another right, then come to a fork and take the left one, then go right, then left, then straight, then we come to a 3 doors, we take the right, go through a tunnel, go left, then we reach the escape pod, right?  
Teth: Yeah, I think  
Zim: His navigation skills are truly incredible, that one!  
Teth: I know! It's so hard to believe _Purple's _the stupider of the Tallest!  
(Because Purple's skill is navigation. Deal with it. Mine's art/writing, Teth's mind control, Sy's hypnosis, Zim's engineering, Zora's prediction, Red's focus/cleverness, Tak's agility, blah blah blah)  
*Flashback*  
_Lard Nar: *frowns* The only part I couldn't get is the directions to the escape pod. There's a maze to it, and it will be impossible to find it_  
_Purple: Oh, that's easy. They take a left, then a right, then another right, then come to a fork and take the left one, then go right, then left, then straight, then they come to a 3 doors, they take the right, go through a tunnel, go left, then they reach the escape pod_  
_Zim: *jaw drops* HOW DID YOU _KNOW _THAT?!_  
_Purple: *puffs out chest* I'm the Almighty Tallest Purple! I can do anything!_  
_Red: *rolls eyes* You mean the donut-obsessed whiny guy who flies around catching donuts while I try to find the problem with our ship? Yeah, I agree_  
_Purple: *scowls* I bet _you _didn't know about the maze!_  
_Red: Good point..._  
*End of flashback*  
Teth: *opens right door* Okay, we're almost there-  
*loud stomping echoes behind them*  
Zim: Sh*t. More guards! Let's go!  
*Both run through tunnel*  
Teth: Finally! We're-  
Guards: Not so fast!  
Teth: ZIM! GET IN!  
Zim: But-  
Teth: Just go! I know what I'm doing  
Zim: *gets in the pod and activates controls*  
Guard: Step away from the pod, Prisoner 77-13  
Teth: *smirks and hits the launch button*  
*pod shoots off Xoloria and into space*  
Guard: *cracks knuckles* He may be off, but that doesn't mean you will escape my wrath  
Teth: *narrows eyes* Oh really?  
*both springs at each other*

* * *

Zim: *speaking to himself (lol Dib imitation FTW)* Holy Irk- what just happened?! Oh well. Zora said that the planet the rebels were on was Evera. I wonder where that is.  
Ship's computer: PROXIMUM WARNING: PLANET AHEAD  
Zim: Already?!  
Ship's computer: You're shooting into space 250 miles per hour. What do you expect?  
Zim: Okay...?  
*lands on Evera*  
Rebel: He has come! The One has arrived!  
Zim: *stares at him* Da h*ll?!

* * *

Teth: *unsheathes knife and slashes at his arm*  
Guard: *cuts against her scarred eye*  
Teth: *throws knife at him, barely missing his head* You can't kill me! Why even try?!  
Guard: *advances on her* You may be dead, but I can still kill your soul!  
Teth: *attempting to stab him* ?!  
Guard: *dodges* You can die again. Except this time, you won't come back. You'd be nothing, and everyone who has ever known you, loved you, will forget that you even existed  
Teth: *freezes, shocked* YOU SPEAK LIES!  
Guard: *takes this moment to cut her scar again*  
Teth: *holding right eye painfully while blood flows down the right side of her face* Oh f*ck you *throws knife at him and succeeds at getting his throat*  
*Both starts slashing at each other, mostly missing, glaring at each with hatred while covered in their own blood, getting weaker and weaker until one falls to the ground*  
Guard: *smirks with triumph as he stared at the blood-stained ground, where Teth's body lay unmoving and lifeless*


	17. Chapter 17

**EDIT: And Mimi isn't thinking all the time. Because she doesn't have a mouth, I put the words in italics (they originally were but fanfiction makes some words bold and gets rid of the italics so yeah. I just decided to fix it.) And, again, Teth isn't dumb. Anon 'tis a VERY special SIR, so that's why he knows stuff she doesn't. Just pointing that out.**

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Woo, 17 already? Full of goo, STUF, and- ANON ABUSE?! No, really. Not embarrassing the charie entirely abuse. I mean locked rooms, screams of pain, murderer and victims, death, electric machines, and love. And I'm stopping on the quote stealling drama spoof. its getting old. and scratch the trilogy idea. THIS IS GONNA HAVE 5-6 BOOKS, D*MNIT! Misubi- my -sona. next chap coming soon, as always. Keyword Destiny is by AzuraAlwaysLies. It's rated M, fulled of TAGR, and FILLED WITH SO MUCH GOO IT'S GONNA EXPLODE :D. GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LORD**

**Chapter 17: Sacrifices and Miracles  
12:04:13, October 11. Location: Evera, the rebel planet**

*Tons of rebels look at Zim in surprise*  
Another rebel: It's true! The One has come! Zora was right!  
Zim: What do you mean "The One"? I am ZIM! Irken invader, Zim  
Rebel: Zora prophesied that you'd come before the four moons aligned!  
Another rebel: BEFORE THE GREAT BATTLE WITH THE NEW EMPIRE!  
Zim: Okay...  
Yet another rebel: We must take you to our leader!  
Another rebel: YES! WE MUST!  
Yet another rebel: *glares at the second rebel* LET US GO!  
Another Rebel: YES! LET US GO!  
Yet another rebel: Stop it, Aciled. It's really annoying  
Aciled: Sorry  
*the leader arrives*  
Leader: WTF are you guys- *sees Zim and clears throat* I am Stallax, leader of the rebels. The time has come, has it not?  
Zim: What time?  
Stallax: *rolls eyes* You couldn't tell there was a battle coming? _How is he even in a prophecy?!_  
Zim: Oh yeah...  
Stallax: Anyhow, the battle is drawing near. We-  
Zim: How near?  
Stallax: *checks watch* Tommorow  
Zim: What?! THAT'S FOREVER  
Stallax: *sighs* Good lord...

* * *

*prisoners walking past big window*  
Anon: Holy f*ck, is that the execution hall?!  
Gaz: And is that TAK'S SIR?!  
Tak: MI-  
Dib: *covers Tak's mouth* You'll blow our cover!  
Tak: I've been looking all over for her! When I found you guys I got distracted- HOLY F*CK!  
Random SIR: *freezes* What was that?!  
Gaz: Well, f*ck, Sticky, you just blew our cover  
Tak: Sticky?  
Gaz: I've been reading Keyword Destiny. It's a TAGR fic. I call you Sticky Tak *laughs*  
Tak: TAGR?! WTF is-  
SIR Unit: *mutters* The escaped prisoners *lifts head* Guards, leave me. Get the prisoners  
Guards: *nod and walk out of room*  
Lard Nar: *narrows eyes irritated* F*ck. Purp, which way?  
Purple: Left turn there's a good place to hide... and why are you calling me Purp?  
Lard Nar: *rolls eyes* Easier to say. And Red keeps using it, and its just rubbing off on me- oh forget it  
Red: Let's just go  
*group runs toward the left turn except Anon, who opened the door the the execution hall and went in*  
IAD: What the- WTF's he doing?!  
GIR: NO, RACHEL, COME BACK! THE TACOS NEED YOUR CALPICO!  
Dib: ...I'm just gonna ignore that  
Sir Unit: *turns around* What, can't you see I'm trying to electrocute someone- Oh hello, Anon *smirks* How was the Underworld?  
Anon: *glares coldly* Let her go, Raj.  
Raj: *laughs* You can't be serious. Look, I haven't tortured someone since last Tuesday. I'm bored out of my-  
Anon: I will take her place  
Mimi: _Don't! You can't!_  
Anon: I don't care about my defense system, Mimi. Go. If I make it-  
Raj: -which you won't  
Anon: *ignores* Find me at the end of the tunnel  
Raj: *unlocks Mimi from machine*  
Mimi: _You can't do this, Anon. You'll disappear forever. You'll be gone, ...forgotten_  
Anon: *smiles grimly* It's too bad no one cares  
Mimi: _But I care. And Teth cares. You don't have to do this-_  
Anon: -But I'm choosing to. Tell Teth I'll miss her. I love you, Mimi. Give Zim a h*ll of a time for me. Raj, take the honors of killing me again, will you?  
Raj: *smiles* With pleasure. *locks Anon in machine* I pity you, bro. But's it's not my fault you're the failed experiment, not me. It's the scientist's fault. But it's too late now. Leave, Mimi. Go to your pathetic mistress and tell her that they have no chance of winning the war  
Mimi: *glances helplessly at Anon and exits room*  
Raj: *hits buttons on machine* You know, brother, I heard this machine worked fairly well on _defectives_  
Anon: *narrows eyes* Oh whatever  
Raj: Ready to die?  
Anon: Yes...

* * *

Teth: *opens eyes* nggh... Wha- Where am I?  
Zora: Well, where the h*ll do ya think you are!  
Teth: Ahh! Zora!  
Zora: It's just me...  
Teth: You have 2 eyes!  
Zora: Well, duh, doesn't everyone?  
Teth: But- oh never mind  
Zora: Well, they say when people die twice they can actually see my second eye...  
Teth: *finally realizes* But I'm nothing! How can you see me?  
Zora: It's still not your time to die  
Teth: *stares at her* Well, f*ck. Can't I ever actually go to my next life?!  
Zora: No, but you get reincarnated in the en- god d*mmit *facepalm*  
Teth: *sits up* What?!  
Zora: *waves hand* Nothing. Anyhow, something you ought to know-  
Teth: What is it?  
Zora: Sorry, can't reveal the plot  
Teth: OH F*CK YOU, MITSUBI!  
(Kay. Next chapter, Teth accidentally got shoved in a garbage disposal and actually DIED this time)  
Teth: Wha- I DIDN'T MEAN IT!  
(Pfft. Fine. But watch your back, Teth. I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE)  
Teth: ...moving on  
Zora: Well, let's put it this way. The One Without a Name is in grave danger  
Teth: *eyes widen* NO!

* * *

Anon: *electrocuted for the 27th time, screams in pain*  
Raj: Good lord, bro! By the way you're screaming, people would think you're a pile of scrap metal on the floor already!  
Anon: *muttering* Easy for him to say, he's not being eletrocuted  
Raj: *looks at meter* Yay! Top level! 2,584 volts a second! Pretty neat, huh?  
Anon: When I get off here you're dead  
Raj: *fake hurt look* Bro, don't say things like that! *smirks* If, not when. Remember that. And like I said, it's too late. Good bye, Anonymous *presses button*  
Anon: *struggling to breath* You won't... get away... with this-  
Raj: It's too late. I already have


	18. Chapter 18

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: THANKS FOR OVER 400 VIEWS SO MUCH :DD! Man, that was the worst 2-day writer's block since the 10th chap. This explains a lot about Anon's past. AND THIS PROVE'S SY'S NOT EVIL! His eyes are naturally green, so when they change, the real side of him's taking control. (And, _no, _Sy and Kyra aren't dating oAo. H*ll no. Read the extended description in mah profile. Its sez SATAZR. NOT SAKR. No way oAo.) No promises on the speed of the next chappie. See ya ^^!**

**Chapter 18: Revenge**

6:31:57, October 11. Location: Escape Tunnel, Xoloria

Teth: HOLY F*CK, YOU JUST KILLED MY SIR!  
Dib: Teth, chillax, we-  
Teth: HOW COULD YOU JUST LET HIM GO?! HE CAN'T STAND UP TO THAT MACHINE ON HIS OWN! HIS DEFENSE SYSTEM WAS DESTROYED WHEN HE DIED! HE CAN'T BE BROUGHT BACK TO LIFE!  
Gaz: Dude, stop flipping  
Teth: *calms down* Sorry, but I'm just really worried  
Red: Apparently  
Mimi: *depressed, head in hands* _This is all my fault..._  
Tak: It's not your fault, Mimi  
Mimi:_ He sacrificed himself... to save me_  
Purple: Did you two know each other or something?  
Mimi: _Yes, after he came back from the Underworld and before I met Tak we started traveling together. We got separated soon after_  
Dib: *laughs* AAMR alert  
Tak: *looks at him* WTF is AAMR?  
Riena: *giggles* Anon and Mimi Romance  
Mimi: *head snaps up* _I AM _NOT_ IN LOVE WITH HIM!_  
Teth: _Dude, admit it, it's really obvious_  
Mimi: *glares* _Can you stop doing that?! it's freaky!_  
Teth:_ Sorry, but its too fun_ *shrugs apologetically*  
Mimi: *glances toward the execution hall* _I hope he survived..._

* * *

Anon: *groans and lifts his head wearily* What the?! How the h*ll am I alive?! That machine should have killed me!  
Zora: It did  
Anon: Then how am I here?  
Zora: Your quest isn't over yet, Anonymous  
Anon: *rolls eyes* If you say so  
Zora: *growing impatient* You don't realize the change?  
Anon: There's a newfound energy coursing through me  
Zora: _Smarter than I thought, that one_ Because, though you may not have known it, you've been absorbing the energy of the volts  
Anon: And?  
Zora: You've got electric powers  
Anon: Well, f*ck. Can I electrocute my brother now?  
Zora: Sure, I guess  
Anon: Okay *walks toward portal of void*  
Zora: _Okay, it's either he's really ignorant or I'm a potato_ Did you notice anything about my eyes? How I got 2?  
Anon: *turns around* What's changed? Haven't you always have 2?  
Zora: *types into computer* _Analysis complete. Success. Enter, Stallax. Failed Experiment 649 may be our only hope_

* * *

*rebel ship flies toward Xoloria*  
Stallax: *frowns* They're on Xoloria?  
Zim: That's the last that I heard  
Stallax: *muttering* I thought they were on Javis... maybe they moved?  
*quiet voice yelling Zim's name rings from Zim's PAK*  
Zim: *leaps up and claws the air frantically* DIB! SHOW YOURSELF! HOW'D YOU AND YOUR FILTHY HEAD OF FILTH GET HERE?!  
Aciled: AAAHH! WHERE?!  
Stallax: *calming Aciled* He's not here Aciled. Calm down already!  
Zim: You know the Dib-monkey?  
Stallax: He knew one guy of the New Empire called Dib. Tortured him for weeks till we both escaped. And anyhow, why were you screaming about *looks at Aciled uneasily* er... you know  
Zim: I swear I heard him...  
Voice: ZIM!  
Zim: *opens PAK, where ball with hologram coming out of the top (like in The Frycook That Came From All That Space) flies out* I KNEW IT! WHAT IS IT, YOU STINKING HYOO-MAN?!  
Dib: *look around at the guards surrounding them* Can you get over here? We're kinda, well I dunno, surrounded and trapped outside the prison while some of the guards are alerting Sy?!  
Zim: *narrows eyes* Oh come on! *turns to Stallax* Speed up the ship's pace. They've been caught

* * *

Guard: The escaped prisoners have been caught, My Lord  
Sy: Good. As soon as they're disposed of, nothing will stop us!  
Guard: They with be executed tonight  
Sy: *eyes change to green suddenly* No! Let them go!  
Guard: ?! *confused* My Lord?  
Sy: *eyes change back to black and red, amulet glows* Send the troops over to kill them  
Guard: *nods and walks away, glancing questionly at Sy before leaving* What was that all about?  
Kyra: _The amulet must be losing power... I'll strengthen it after the battle_ *laughs* This was too easy  
Sy: *laughs along, only there's a green tinge in his eyes and his laugh seemed forced* After nearly killing them, you'd think they've figured out we're undefeatable *the green tinge vanishes*  
Kyra: Yes... nothing can stop us now

* * *

Anon: *opens eyes*  
Raj: *turns around, alarmed* _How is he not dead?! I swear he was dead a minute ago!_ *hides shock* I was wondering when you'd wake up.  
Anon: I guess. Were you expecting me to wake up sooner  
Raj: *glares* I'm not the one with my limbs strapped to an electric machine  
Anon: I'm not the one who knows he's lost, but is to prideful to admit it  
Raj: Wrong answer *hits button for voltage*  
Anon: *machine does no effect on him* Give up, Raj  
Raj: _How the h*ll did that not work?!_  
Anon: *leaps off machine* I may have been that failed experiment you've always known, but I've changed, brother. *smiles* I've changed. *sends voltage straight through Raj*  
Raj: *eyes narrow* You will not win!  
Anon: *shoots volt right through him, killing him, and smirks, eyes glowing yellow* Too late, Raj  
Guards: *stream through entrance, fully armed*  
Anon: *antennae droops* Aw f*ck


	19. Chapter 19

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: HOLY! 430 VIEWS! THANK YEWSSSS! Anyhow, frankly this chappie is full of romance and fightscenes. Anon's best quote's here, and next chappie's the battle. That could take me a long time cuz i suck fight scenes. And for the flirting, SAZR is a pairing too, y'know. Lol Stallax's acting like a mindless teen- oh wait- he is one. Who do you think's gonna die next chap (besides the obvious)? I got some of them planned on dying soon :D. I do like thai food, though...**

**Chapter 19: Shattered**

6:31:57, October 11. Location: Escape Tunnel, Xoloria

*Stallax's laptop beeps*  
Stallax: Hmm? *checks screen, reads Zora's message, and replies* _FAILED EXPERIMENT 649?! HE WAS THE WEAPON ALL ALONG?!_  
Zora: _That's what I said_  
Stallax: _Thank god!_  
Zora: _Who's "god"?_  
Stallax: *sweatdrops* _It's an Earth term_  
Zora: _Okay... anyhow, Raj is dead, thank "god", but 649's trapped by guards. He's just gone temporarily insane_  
Stallax: _Oh h*ll_  
Zora: _It did have him regain his senses though... he was about to become a homicidal maniac_  
Stallax: _You mean like Nny?_  
Zora: _WHO?!_  
Stallax: _Johnny the Homicidal Maniac. You don't get around much, do you?_  
Zora: _internet smack_  
Stallax: _ouch_  
Zora: _Why do you read that bullsh*t?!_  
Stallax: _JTHM is NOT BULLSH*T! ANYTHING BY JHONEN VASQUEZ IS NOT BULLSH*T!_  
Zora: *sighs* _Can't you ever stay on topic for something longer than 5 seconds?!_  
Stallax: _Whatever. Anyhow, gtg. It's hard to type and drive the same time_  
Zora: _I KEEP TELLING YOU NOT TO DO THAT!_  
Stallax:_ Okay, Mom. I'll get back to school now_  
Zora: _internet punch_  
Stallax: _Why do you keep internet-whatevering me?_  
Zora:_ Well, I'd do it off the internet if you were with me_  
Stallax: _Aw f*ck thank god. Seriously though. gtg_  
Zora:_ Just one more thing_  
Stallax: _Hmm?_  
Zora: _internet stabs you repeatedly with Teth's knife until you're nothing but a puddle of blood on the floor :D_  
Stallax: _Wha- WHAT WAS THAT FOR!_  
Zora: _No reason. Luv ya. Mwah _*signs off*  
Zim: *peers over Stallax's shoulder* Whatcha doin?  
Stallax: *covers computer screen* Nothing!  
Zim: Oooh. Is she your girlfriend or something?  
Stallax: *blushes furiously* She's not my girlfriend!  
Aciled: YEAH SHE IS!  
Stallax: Okay... so she is but-  
Zim: HOLY F*CK! *calls the other via hologram on his PAK* STALLAX LOVES ZORA! STALLAX LOVES ZORA! STALLAX LOVES ZORA!  
Teth: *calls back* Who the h*ll is Stallax?  
Zora: ...I have no idea  
Zim: *got the same cap's illness Dib had in chappie 10 (err.. idk whatever)* YEAH YOU DO! YA INTERNET BEAT HIM UP AND THEN INTERNET BLEW HIM A KISS!  
Zora: *disconnects and blushes* Pretend that never happened  
Teth: *smirks* Sorry. That moment was permanently burned to my brain  
Zora: *goes back to fighting the guards* F*ck...

* * *

Mimi: *turns and goes to the Execution hall*  
Tak: Mimi?! What are you doing?!  
Mimi: *looks at her* _I have a feeling he's in trouble_  
Anon: What are you doing here?! You'll get killed!  
Mimi: *rolls eyes* _There's 27 guards and 1 of you. You won't stand a chance_  
Anon: Good point *electrocutes a guard while dodging another*  
Mimi: *grabs a different guard with her claw and slams him into wall* _How'd you do that?!_  
Anon: *electrocutes another guard* Do what?  
Mimi: *dodges a bullet* _You know, the electrification?_  
Anon: *shoots at guard while ducking a knife swipe* _Oh, that? I dunno_  
Mimi: *rolls eyes* _Of course you don't_  
Anon: Look out! *pushes her away from a missile*  
*tacky romance in fight scene FTW*  
Mimi: _...That was...awkward..._  
Anon: ...You don't say... *gets off her* Okay. That never happened  
Mimi: Agreed  
Guards: *starts receding back the way the came and locks door*  
Anon: Why are they leaving?  
Mimi: _We couldn't have defeated them already!_  
Anon: *staring at something with his eyes wide, speechless*  
Mimi: _What?_ *follows his gaze*  
Anon: *points to bomb feebly* What now?  
Bomb: *ticking* 5...4...3...  
Mimi: _...Let's run screaming!_  
*both run out of the room screaming just as the bomb explodes*  
Teth: *turns just as Anon and Mimi escape*_ HE'S ALIVE! But he seems different... shattered, almost._ What the- YOU'RE ALIVE!  
Anon: Well, yeah-  
Teth: Did you really get electric powers?!  
Anon: How'd she know? Yes  
Teth: Was that you screaming?  
Anon: ...Yes  
Teth: You really are alive, this isn't a dream?  
Anon: *narrows eyes, annoyed* Yes  
Teth: What about-  
Anon: Shut up or I'm gonna have to shoot you  
Teth: _Scratch that thought_ *noogies him xD* Ah, there he is!  
*ships crashes in front of them out of nowhere*  
Zim: *jumps out the ship's window* We're here!  
Stallax: *goes after him* I'm never letting you drive again  
Gaz: Finally! Reinforcements!  
Guard: *smirks* It's not over yet, you know  
*tons of soldiers come streaming in, Kyra and Sy leading them*  
Zim: D*mmit  
Red: ATTACK!


	20. Chapter 20

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: I named this chapter surprise for 2 reasons:**

**1. it's the last word said**

**2. it was a ****_surprise _****i actually finished**

**Let's face it. I suck at fight scenes. This is an entire chapter full of it. I get stressed when i write them. When stressed, I go on FH. when i got on FH, i pretend i am not writing an iZ fanfic with 520+ views. HOLY SH*T THANK YOU! Anyhow. Not to spoil, here's the rest at the bottom of this (don't read it till your done with this story part. im making a memorial for the ones i destroyed horridly with epic gore of goriness :D)**

**Chapter 20: Surprise!**

7:31:57, October 11. Location: Xoloria, the prison planet

*multiple rebels and soldiers start attacking each other*  
Zim: *starts shooting rapidly at a soldier*  
Soldier: *dodges but slows down suddenly, bleeding from a shot in his arm*  
Zim: *notices and shoots at his arm*  
Soldier: *guards bleeding arm fiercely, takes Zim from behind and shoots him in the shoulder*  
Zim: *turns around angrily and shoots him until he's dead on the floor still gushing blood, then scans the area for a new enemy to attack*  
Teth: *slashes at a soldier, then dodges him and cuts him in half completely (ouch o. . that has GOT to hurt)*  
Tak: *mercilessly shoots at a soldier, fails to notice the looming soldier behind her*  
Dib: NO! *leaps in front of her, protecting her but getting shot right through the heart*  
Tak: *staring numbly at the human whose sacrificed himself for her, the boy who's head WASN'T ACTUALLY THAT BIG, screams bloody murder and kills every soldier she saw straight away*  
Zim: *finding Dib's death hard to process* _The stink-boy's dead?!_ *turns attention to the soldier in front of him*  
Soldier: *shoots at him, ducks his bullet, and shoots with perfect aim, hitting Zim in his right arm so he couldn't shoot*  
Zim: *smiles* You're pretty good!  
Soldier: *narrows her eyes* _What the h*ll?!_  
Zim: *shoots her in the head and smirks* Too bad I'm ambidextrous  
*bolt of electricity barely misses Zim*  
Zim: ?!  
Anon: Sorry 'bout tha- okay never mind  
Zim: Why do you hate me anyway?  
Anon: Is there any reason to like you?  
Zim: Well-  
Anon: My point exactly *electrocutes a soldier*  
Zim: I still don't get how you do that *starts shooting at a soldier, and ducks a bullet*  
Anon: The electricity? Me neither  
IAD: *shoots a soldier in the brain, zips up so 2 soldiers stab each other instead of him, and shoots 2 more*  
Zim: *watching admiringly* He may be a midget but he's amazing with a gun  
*loud bang, then a soft thud makes Zim groan*  
Anon: *staring at the place where IAD's body lay broken in a puddle of blood, neck torn open, his eye twitches (Anon's not IAD's! That would be gross o.O)* ...And there he goes  
Teth: *dodges a swipe from a guard, and tosses her knife at him* Hey, you guys gonna stand there for all eternity or will you fight? We're in a huge battle, if you forgot!  
Zim and Anon: *sweatdrops* Oh. Right *goes back to fighting*  
Zim: *turns head and sees a soldier typing on something*  
Anon: What's he doin?!  
Zim: I don't know... but I'm gonna find out! *leaps at the soldier*  
Soldier: Wtf?! *hits send button and dodges, then shoots at Zim*  
*multiple glowing lights glow through the darkness*  
Zim: *eyes wide * It can't be- They don't even have legs!  
Soldier: *smirks* Hoverdisks. You're going down, rebel. The time has come for a new era!  
*lasers and bullets fly, multiple rebels and shot down, including Tak and Lard Nar*  
*a laser passes harmlessly through the soldier*  
Zim: HOW THE H*LL DID YOU-  
Soldier: *shoots at Zim* They're programmed to kill you, not us.  
Zim: *dodges and shoots at the soldier* Stupid Control Brains  
Soldier: *pins Zim to the wall* They were the cold unfeeling robot arm that you said you loved in Parent Teacher Night  
Zim: They were?  
Soldier: *points gun at Zim* Pssh. Duh. Who else?  
Zim: *shrugs* If I knew they'd go insane, I never would have said that  
Soldier: *smirks and gets in a position to pull the trigger* If you knew about the Dark Side, would you have realized that it isn't the Control Brains that are the problem? That you would know that even if they die we shall never be destroyed? You were wrong about everything. Too bad you'll die before you could tell them the truth-  
Zim: *whips out gun and shoots him through the head, then smiles victoriously* -And then he gets killed by the amazing ZIM!  
*one soldier freezes staring at the dead soldier*  
Soldier: HOW DARE YOU KILL HIM! *springs at Zim and slices at him with her knife*  
Zim: _She's gone insane. Must've been dating him or somethi-_ *ducks her knife blade by mere inches and shoots helplessly at the maddened soldier, missing because of her speed and feriousity*  
Soldier: *slashing madly with her knife, blocking Zim's bullets and cutting him all over, until a pure miracle happens (for Zim, at least), as one of the bullets lodge itself into her heart, and she crumples to the ground*  
Zim: *standing over her* _Whew! I thought I'd never kill her!_ *leans against the blood-splattered wall panting, exhausted and bleeding wildly*  
*a particularly short soldier appears (same height as Zim), with black eyes with slanted red pupils, and an glowing red amulet*  
Zim: *frozen with shock* YOU!  
Sy: *grins maliciously* Surprise!

**AUTHOR'S NOTE (CON'T): **

**Lard Nar: Seriously, I love thai food, but i really wanted to kill him. There was no other use. but im bein pretty mean to Riena here. IAD and lardy (friend and boyfriend xD), I mean, f*ck, if i were her i'd just curl up and die**

**IAD: most of mah friends are thinking ****_WTF?! HE'S GONNA LIVE A CRUEL AND HORRID LIFE THEN DIE, THEN COME BACK AS A GHOST AND THEN DIE AGAIN?! _****but i- well yes, he is. He's one of mah fave characters, and by fave i mean, loves to torture and kill. But his story will be told soon in my TG bios im workin on. Who was this strange defective Xolorian, and how is he MORE than just a side character? Stay tuned- *shot***

**Tak: Zim has to live on, and like Renillan (Warriors names in an _iZ _fanfic? No thanks!), Tak isn't one to break her promises. remember, she promised she'd kill zim in the end, right? so sorry, Sticky, but chu gotta go**

**Dib: i actually wasn't planning for him to die, but what the heck, right? romance in a fight scene to make up for the puny amounts of DATR im putting in here. who could ask for anything more?**

**Let these four deceased souls rise, im sorry it had to end like this, ciao, sayonara, goodbye nurses. **


	21. Chapter 21

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ZOMG i can't believe it. ITS THE LAST CHAPTER! (that's why its over 1000 words, minus this note.) ANYHOW: Sy ****_really _****hates the Tallest (apparently), and there's some spoofs cuz the last chap won't be complete without em, neh :P? (such as the food thing, who's Dib? serial killer, you know). im scared now, cuz i still cant decide on the plot of the second book, so im making a chracter bio thing that i MIGHT POST HERE. also I'm starting another story called LOST (starring Gir), then the Silverstar thing (Into the Void), BUT: i'll be typing 2 at a time, so while LOST is coming on, i'll make sure to make the second book of this too ^^ THANKS FOR THE 560+ VIEWS KEEP IT COMIN Y'ALL GOD D*MNIT GONNA MISS TYPIN THIS *gives out free internet cookies* FOR MY AWESOME READERS/REVIEWERS LOVE YA MWAH *blows kiss***

**Chapter 21: Not over yet...**

8:56:37, October 11. Location: Xoloria, the prison planet

Zim: You- You killed your own-  
Sy: *waves hand dismissively* Yes, yes I know, I killed the freak with mind powers, who the h*ll cares-  
Zim: This can't be you! You never would have become this!  
Sy: People change, life goes on... *smirks* idiots like you die *shoots at Zim*  
Zim: *dodges* Invader Zim? Idiot? You speaks liiiiiiiieeeeeeeess *shoots at Sy's heart, but somehow the bullet swerves and almost hits his amulet*  
Sy: *rolls eyes* Oh brother- *guards the amulet, his eyes glittering, full of hate*  
Zim: _So that's his weakness!_ *keeps aiming at the amulet, while a bullet barely skims his antennae*  
Sy: Give up already! You can't win! *gets shot in the shoulder and shoots Zim back*  
Zim: *gets hit in the leg, stumbles and his bullet misses* I won't give up until you're destroyed!  
Sy: *laughs coldly* Oh, sure. Do you think you're gonna live long enough? *grabs Zim by the neck, pushes him to the ground, and shoves his gun near Zim's brain*  
Zim: *trying to get up, gasping for air* Sy...please..._remember..._  
Sy: What is there to remember? All that's worth remembering will be seeing you die  
Zim: You... can't do... this!  
Sy: *confused look* Then how am I doing it right now?  
Zim: *shrugs* I dunno. It's a Dib-hyoo-man imitation  
Sy: Who's he?  
Zim: *bland look* I don't know either...  
(Oh, come on! YOU DON'T REMEMBER DI-)  
Zim: Oh yeah! He's that hyoo-man who kept ruining my plans to destroy Earth. Man, that was a reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally big head.  
(Okay, good. I was afraid I'd have to change Gaz's line about your memory of a coconut to one of an ice cream sundae. With extra chocolate sauce. And whipped cream! Mmmm, whipped cream...)  
Sy: *ignores me* Anyhow, er- *looks at script* I think it would look great with your head mounted on the Massive's wall, don't you think? *about to pull trigger*  
Zim: *suddenly pushes the gun away* I won't let you destroy the empire!  
Sy: *narrows eyes* We're not destroying it, we're improving it! All this nonsense about who's f*cking tall and who's barely 3 feet, I'm sick of it! 5 planets, Zim. 5 planets I've invaded, conquered, destroyed for the Empire! They stare at me like I'm f*cking crazy, thinking, "Oh h*ll, he's done it again. We're running out of tall invaders to give the credit to!" They assign me to yet another planet! I'm like, "F* ck you, I don't need another dude 4 feet taller than me to pretend they did my work!" Next thing you know, they fire me! Destroyed my SIR, took my ship, did you and Teth even notice that I was gone, banished from the Empire just cuz I cussed in their f*cking God-d*mn faces?!  
Zim: And this is why... Holy f*ck- I- I never knew- I- SO THAT'S WHY I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN FOREVER- er, until you killed Teth-  
Sy: What, do you think I would have abandoned you guys for no reason *a green flicker, -appears then disappears- in his eyes*  
Zim: Well, I mean, I dunno, speaking that you're a serial killer...  
*both look at the ground uncomfortably*  
Sy: _Oh yeah, that's my cue_ *shoots at Zim so hard the force knocks him of his feet (Zim, not Sy, I mean)*  
Zim: Wha- What was that for?!  
Sy: *smirks* Dude. I'm a serial killer, remember?  
Zim: Oh yeah... *continues to shoot at the amulet*  
Sy: *dodges* The Tallests' rule has got to end! What will become of us? You, me, Teth, we're the shortest irkens who ever lived! They scowl at us because of our height! This nonsense- about height- has got to end! *shoots Zim's gun out of his hands*  
Zim: _Oh h*ll_ But is this how we're going to change it? You should be thankful The Almighty Tallests' haven't killed you by now! *reaches for gun, slips on a puddle of his own blood*  
Sy: *advances on him* THERE IS NOTHING TO BE THANKFUL FOR! WE NEED THEM DEAD! THIS TYRANNY OF TALLNESS HAS RUINED OUR EMPIRE!  
Zim: Think of all they've done for our empire! The Almighty Tallest-  
Sy: *eyes glow* -The so-called "almighty" Tallest sit around in the massive all day eating snacks! The Control Brains do all the work (that's why we use them, not the Tallest) while they just-  
Zim: *panting on his hands and knees, staring up at Sy* -THE ALMIGHTY TALLEST WOULD HAVE NEVER BROUGHT THIS UPON US!  
Sy: *eyes flickering green, then black and red, then green, then black and red, etc.) It's too late now. You were stupid enough to side with them and now its time to face the consequences! *pulls trigger*  
Zim: *leaps up, reaches out suddenly and grabs the amulet, trying to pull it off Sy's neck*  
*f*ck yeah super slowmo*  
*(the most famous scene of the entire book) Zim rips off the amulet, bloods streams from where it once was resting on Sy's neck, his eyes go green and he crumples to the ground*  
*the amulet, once red, stopped glowing and turned black*  
Zim: Holyf*ckholyf*ckholyf*ckholyf*ckholy- wait he'll come back to life right? He has to become a ghost or something like Teth did- COME ON, MAN BREATHE! BREATHE! *stares wide-eyed and fidgeting*  
Teth: *appears just then* So you've undid the curse?  
Zim: What curse?  
Teth: *rolls eyes* The curse of the amulet  
Zim: Doesn't ring a bell  
Teth: Didn't you pay attention in hist- oh never mind, you're not alone- if he would have payed attention he might not have been stupid enough to accept her deal  
Zim: Wait- what?!  
Teth: You're very stupid, you know that? Dude, wake up and read the frickin plot (lol aka "Wake up and smell the coffee xD)  
Zim: Did you just call me st-  
Sy: *coughs* What the- oh hey-  
Zim: DUDE! YOU'RE ALIVE MAN!  
Sy: No, I'm a ghost-  
Teth: Wait- THAT QUICKLY?!  
Sy: Yeah-  
Teth: It took me 36 years just to get there  
Sy: *smirks* Shortcut  
Teth: Okay, next time I see him, I'm totally killing Rostavin ...stupid little rat- can't believe he lied about-  
*suddenly a glowing light appears and engulfs all the ghosts*  
Riena: YES! FINALLY! REINCARNATION!  
Teth: *grabs alien fundip from her PAK and starts eating it ravenously* FOOD!  
Zim: Couldn't you eat when you were a ghost?  
Teth: No  
Sy: There's something I need to warn you about  
Zim: Yeah?  
Sy: The one who- er, well, Kyra. She's the one who tricked me. She's still around. She's lost the hypnosis (cuz that was me) so the services drones and everyone aren't on her side, but she still has an army. She still can destroy us  
Teth: You mean-  
Sy: *nods grimly* The battle is over, but the war still lasts

**END OF BOOK 1**

**(dun dun dun)**


End file.
